


You are My Monster (aka If Steven had ranted for just a little bit longer)

by Fanat1c



Series: You Are My Monster extended Multiverse. [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:28:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23446276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanat1c/pseuds/Fanat1c
Summary: In Everything is Fine Steven ends the episode with the I'm a Monster rant. But what if when he got to the part where he comes to that realization his reaction had been different and he didn't turn into a Monster?
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe (Eventual), Connie Maheswaren & Steven Universe, Ruby/Sapphire
Series: You Are My Monster extended Multiverse. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1945468
Comments: 35
Kudos: 221





	1. Everything is Not Fine

Steven wasn’t too thrilled with the gems and Connie blocking him from leaving the house that was clear. Turning around he finds himself blocked by Garnet who tells him “Steven you have to stop running” which was followed up by a small “please” from his father.

Pausing for a moment Steven feels his face swell up for a minute instantly causing Connie to instantly become worried “Steven” she tells him “we should get you back to the hospital” 

The information that Steven had gone to a hospital shocked both Amethyst and Pearl, even causing Pearl to ask when he had gone there.

“You didn’t tell them?” Asked Connie. Steven took a moment to internally chuckle at the irony that she was now the one admonishing him for keeping something from his family. 

His enjoyment was short-lived as he realized that the Gems learning he had been to the hospital is only going to worry them more causing him to hyperventilate and swell more. “It wasn't that important, you guys. You're making a big deal out of nothing” he said in an attempt to calm the situation “Have I done some things wrong? Sure! I trashed the house today, I broke an anvil. What teenager hasn't? Dad and I had a little disagreement. That's practically a rite of passage! I mean, it would be weird if we didn't, right?”

Steven knee he should have stopped there after all eyes turned to his dad, but realized he’d opened the floodgates and was unable to close them continuing on saying “And maybe, I've had a not-so-nice thought or two about, like, you know, slamming White Diamond's head through a pillar, but it's not like I actually went through with it! I only actually shattered Jasper!”

That last comment was the final straw that elicited a muffled gasp from Pearl, a “What!” from Amethyst and Connie to ask if he was joking.

Noticing he has once again upset his family Steven tries to reassure them by telling them “Oh, don't worry! I fixed that too! I can fix anything. I can just keep messing up and fixing things forever, and you'll never have to know or think about any of it!” 

Garnet tries to reach out to him even beginning to say “Steven…” but he cuts her off “How messed up is that? That I've gotten away with this for so long. You have no idea how bad I am.”

This shocks the group even further Garnet sullenly looks down and grimaces, Pearl puts her fist in her mouth in horror, Amethyst looks defeated, Greg begins to cry a little, and Connie stands looking as if she could throw up at any second.

Usually, this would be where Steven stops and apologies for scaring them, but this time he can’t bring himself to and instead keeps going. “You think I'm so great, and I'm so mature, and I always know what to do, but that's not true. I haven't learned a thing from my problems. They've all just made me worse. You think of me as some angel, but I'm not that kid anymore! And none of you have cared to really pay attention to that!”

After Steven finishes ranting the room is filled with an eerie silence for a few moments before Amethyst piped up with “what do you mean? We’ve tried to keep up with you.”

Steven snorted at this saying “oh you have now” in a blank tone “your attempts have been half-hearted at best.”

Before anyone could respond to that Connie’s phone flicked to life with videos of several different moments of everyone in the room not really trying to help him. Connie going off to study without a second glance, Greg praising him for having the guts to tell him off, the beginning of the training with Jasper making sure his location sharing was on so that the gems would be able to find him, and Garnet saying “we’ll take your word for it” earlier that day.

That collection of moments silenced everyone in the room “did it ever occur to anyone that I didn’t know how to ask for help.” Steven said, his voice sounding raw and broken. 

This ended up being the final straw for Garnet who split into Sapphire and Ruby

Steven finally took a moment to look around at the scene before him. Feeling ashamed that his rant hurt everyone so badly he shrank down to regular size and returned to his normal pigmentation.

After a few silent moments, Steven suddenly snapped in one direction asking “what was that?” He then snapped the other way started glowing pink and responded “what do you mean”

Confused Connie was the first to take a step forward saying “Steven what are you doing?”

Seeming completely oblivious to Connie’s question Steven switched back to normal and continued “oh you know what I mean, what was with shaming them and the videos” Steven then changed pink and responded, “I told them the truth. Besides, you were the one who tried denying that anything was wrong”

“What’s going on with him!” Greg worriedly asked. 

“I don’t know” replied Pearl “it’s as if he’s had a psychotic break

Everyone watched Steven as he continued to swap between pigments and glare at an invisible person for a little while before swapping back to normal for the last time and shouting: “If you have such a problem with them you can tell them yourself!” before clutching his gut and dropping to his knees.

Steven let out a blood-curdling scream as he rapidly changed between his normal color and pink. Then almost as quickly as it had begun the screaming stopped and Steven was left kneeling on the floor he looked up at his family around him with a sad look before removing his hands from his stomach, as he did something clattered onto the ground and rolled into the middle of the room.

Something that shocked everyone. That something was Steven’s Gem.


	2. The Pink Hued Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steven Rips his Gem Out and Pink Steven argues not just with his family but with his human side as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My main notes are at the end but I want to clarify the tone of each Steven since I’m not leaving Pink as just robotic
> 
> H.Steven - like a Toned down Everything is fine Steven who is still obviously in denial about most things
> 
> P.Steven - Actually accepts and processes things rationally. Is completely fed up not just with everyone else but his Human counterpart as well.

The entire room was silent as everyone stared at the display before them. Steven kneeling on the ground with blood seeping through his shirt while his gem lay a few inches away.

“Oh what now, I finally give you a chance to speak your mind and you hideaway.” Steven says to the gemstone in a mocking tone before looking up at his family “Sorry for making you wait I guess he was more talk than show”

Steven then looked around the room and noticed that nobody had moved an inch “What’s wrong guys?” 

After a moment Amethyst stepped forward “dude… what did you do?” She asked

Steven stares blankly at her for a moment as he processes the question before he cheerfully answers “Oh I ripped out my Gem!” Shocking everyone once again shocking everyone.

“You what!” Came a scream from Pearl “Why would you purposely rip out your gem, especially after White removed it”.

This confuses Greg who was about to ask about what they were talking about but gets cut off by Connie when she adds “Yeah That’s one of the main traumatic experiences that have stuck with you. Willingly recreating it cannot be good for your mental health not to mention the effects it can have on your body!”

Steven cocks his head and frowns “well the idea was that since the two of us were having a disagreement over how we felt” punctuating this by pointing at the gem “that we could both discuss the situation if someone would ever COME OUT OF THE GEM!” 

Right on cue, the Gemstone rises into the air cycling through the avatars of Pink Diamond, Rose Quartz, and Classic Steven before settling on current Steven and gracefully floating to the ground.

The Pink hued Steven uncomfortably looked around at everyone in the room before turning to his human counterpart with a scowl “That was an incredibly stupid decision”.

“What was?”

“You know what.”

Pink Steven rolled his eyes when he saw the blank expression on his human counterpart’s face “I’m talking about ripping us apart to prove a point.”

H.Steven took offense at this, retorting with “A bad idea! We finally get to reveal our own unique perspectives on how we feel!”

H.Steven stood up and took two steps towards P.Steven only to crumble in pain and land right back on the ground. Causing Greg to push by the gems and run to the human side of his son.

“STEVEN! are you okay”

“Yeah dad I— I’m fine”

P.Steven scowled at this turning to the gems and Connie “Negative”

“What are you talking about” asked Ruby

“He is lying” flatly replied P.Steven once again rolling his eyes at the confused group in front of him “He is quite obviously bleeding!”

Pearl stepped forwards from the group walking over to Steven who clenched up as she kneeled down placing a hand on the soaked star emblem on his shirt.

“Does it hurt that much?” She asked.

“Yes” H.Steven sheepishly replied.

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“Because I didn’t want to worry any of you more than you were.”

P.Steven groaned at this “And that’s why we’re in this situation”

“Dude I don’t think that th—“ Amethyst started before being Cut off by P.Steven

“Don’t start with the while then situation isn’t as bad speech’ because I was the part of Steven that coined it and I can tell that the other half of us bleeding out is as bad if not worse than it looks!”

Everyone in the room was unnerved by the callous and cynical response of P.Steven

“Okay we’re getting nowhere with this I’m going to need to take Fleshy over there with me” P.Steven said as he formed a large bubble around H.Steven; who instantly fell unconscious.

As he prepared to leave he found himself wrapped in Amethyst’s whip.

“No way man you aren’t going anywhere with him” she cockily said

P.Steven merely began to vibrate externally fast to the point he was able to phase through it. Only to find himself at the end of Pearl’s Spear.

“Let him go” she told him

“Pearl you know I can’t do that” he responded

Pearl only got angrier at this “I will not let you take him Pink!”

P.Steven froze, his diamond shaped pupils contracting. Pearl, realizing her mistake opened her mouth to apologize but was silenced as P.Steven held his hand up to her gem causing it to glow Pink. 

“She is gone, and frankly I’m insulted that you broke your promise.” P.Steven thought for a moment before saying “Freeze, three minutes” leaving Pearl frozen in place. 

Before P.Steven could process his situation from behind him a scream of “WHY YOU!” came from Ruby. Steven summoned a thin Hexagonal wall piece between his head and Ruby who was currently flying through the air.

Once Ruby was on the ground P.Steven turned to her “Really Ruby! You out of all people I would have expected to understand. You love every little thing you see and do, surely you can see that I am trying to protect Steven’s human half out of familial love! Or do you think it’s once again better to let him stick to his gut and bleed to death.” 

Ruby was shocked for a moment before considering what P.Steven said. “You’re right… I trust that you have his best interests in mind.”

“Thank you for trusting me Ruby” P.Steven said

“Don’t prove me wrong”

P.Steven nodded before continuing to the door.

“STOP!” He heard Greg yell from behind him.

“Oh for Stars sake” P.Steven said “He’s dying!”

“Says you!” Greg retorted “I will not let you waltz over my family and friends so you can take my boy!”

P.Steven Scoffed at his father’s remarks

“So that’s who this is for huh, Your son”

“Yes”

“The same son that I’m a part of, the same son you raised in a van, The Same Son You Pawned Off Onto The Gems, The Same Son Whose Life That You Actively Weren’t A Part Of!, THE SAME SON THAT YOU HID YOUR FAMILY FROM!” 

“Of course, except I refuse to believe someone like you can be any part of my son”

P.Steven chuckled at that “Wow Greg… you really know so little about us that you can’t believe that we were hurting.”

“Wait did you just call me Greg?” He asked his confident facade cracking

“Yes because you haven’t really tried to help me get over anything; I mean the road trip was a nice distraction but you didn’t put in any of the work to help me confront my problems, only to hide them away. And if you don’t put in the work then you can’t just make everything better by singing some stupid song.”

With that P.Steven left the beach house pulling the sleeping H.Steven behind him hoping that nobody would try to follow him…

“Steven Wait Up!”

Of course he couldn’t be that lucky. He turned around to see Connie running after Him.

“Where are you going?” She asked

“If you need to know I’m bringing him to the hospital your mom works at,”

“Hm” she laughed “That’s actually pretty smart but how are you going to get there”

As a response P.Steven used his powers to punch a hole in space much like Lion can.

“Like that” he added

Connie looked at him for a moment before making up her mind on something

“Can I come with you?”

“What… why?”

“Because you are the two halves of my best friend and I don’t think either of you should be alone together for the time being”

P.Steven thought a moment before answering.

“Of course you can come Connie, besides I have the least problems with you because you tried a little to protect Steven’s feelings.”

Connie grinned sadly at his comments before responding “don’t worry, once he’s in recovery we can all have a chat over what we all meant that night”

P.Steven cracked his first ever smile when he heard that before turning to the portal “Come on Connie let’s save half of a life.”

With that the three teenagers entered the portal and with a blinding flash of Light, them as well as the portal were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there was chapter 2 Yay!! I’m really enjoying writing this and I hope you all are too! As for now see you next week with more (kind of) fun times with our two Stevens!


	3. Waiting Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> P.Steven and Connie have a long overdue Chat while H.Steven is in the ER Operating Room

About an hour had passed since Connie and P.Steven walked into the ER with the unconscious H.Steven causing Dr. Maheswaran to rush the Human side of Steven back into the hospital. An hour of uncomfortable silence Between the two left behind.

Eventually, Connie decided to make the first move “were you trying to hurt the Gems back there?”

“What?” A confused P.Steven responded

“The things you said about the Gems, fighting against them; it seemed like you weren’t holding back”

P.Steven considered his answer for a moment before settling with “In a way I was, the gems were actively treating me like Pink Diamond and Humie like he was Steven; they would never take her word over his so I said what I knew would hold them back, but when they pushed so did I”

“Then why didn’t you say something to everyone?” Connie asked

“I may have been holding back from telling everyone everything.”

“Why?”

“Because that is for Steven to tell, not me or Fleshy”

Connie mulled P.Steven’s words over for a bit before turning back to him. “What exactly are you?”

“As in?” P.Steven responded

“Well I mean you’re obviously Steven’s gem but you seem different, Not just from Steven but from the last time we met.” She clarified

P.Steven thought about the best way to answer Connie’s question before settling on telling her everything. 

“Imagine that we are the two halves of Steven’s personality, Human represents what the smaller Steven was and I represent him trying to grow and mature. Both of us feel the same way and have the same memories and pain so we can blend into one person.”

“And you’re the gem half because you’re more responsible and rational” she filled in

“Everything I talked about is more or less how both Fleshy and regular Steven feel, but because I’m willing to talk about it I seem different in comparison”

“So that’s how Steven feels about his closest family?”

P.Steven gritted his teeth at having to tell her “yes”

Connie took a moment to process this information then calmly turned to P.Steven and asked “How does Steven feel about me?”

P.Steven felt his Heart..? Sink when he heard her ask, For everyone else, it was easy because he could walk away from them but Connie would let him just walk away.

“Why are you asking me this? Once this is over I think Steven will be more than willing to talk to you”

“If you need to know” Connie responded, “it’s because I trust you, to be honest, now please tell me how he feels.”

“I really don’t feel that this is the right time to discuss this, I mean human is in the operating room right now”

“You’re deflecting the question”

“No, I’m not I ju—“ P.Steven started but was cut off by Connie

“Yes, you are! I’m not asking that much, you were willing to tell everyone else what’s different here?”

P.Steven curled legs onto his chair and tried to cover his ears

“I don’t want to tell you,” He said quietly

“Why don’t you?” She responded

“Please don’t make me do this now,” P.Steven said beginning to nervously sweat

“You talked about everyone except me… Why won’t you just say what he thinks of me!” Connie yelled standing up over the scared P.Steven “Do I not deserve to know how my best friend really feels about me!”

P.Steven stuttered through Connie's Barrage becoming more and more stressed eventually cracking under the pressure yelling “BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO HURT YOU!” 

“BUT KEEPING ME IN THE DARK IS ALREADY HURTING ME!” She shouted back.

P.Steven was boxed in, his options were to not tell her and risk her leaving or tell her and risk her leaving. After deciding that either way he loses he resigned himself to telling her.

“Steven.. er.. I am still hurting from the proposal, I understand why you said not now and I know that you took every step possible to let me down as gently as possible but it still hurts.”

Connie sighed at this. “I guess I expected as much, now I at least understand why you were having such a hard time opening up to me.”

Connie outwardly had seemed fine. But as she finished her thought her normal calm demeanor began to break down as she began to hyperventilate confirming P.Steven’s fear.

“This is all my fault” she said confusing P.Steven

“How is this your fault?” He asked “You were totally in the right to reject me”

“It’s not the rejection that hurt you this much was it, it was that I left you alone to process it.”

“But you had to study” P.Steven said trying to make her feel better “you were preparing for your future!”

“But what type of future is that Steven? Knowing that I dealt one of the penultimate blows that caused this entire situation.” Connie responded.

“But you didn’t know that this would happen” P.Steven told her “...And maybe it wasn’t Steven’s brightest idea to seek out help from Jasper and the Diamonds.”

Even though P.Steven was trying his hardest to make her feel better Connie wasn’t budging from her position and even looked as though she was about to start crying. 

After another minute she turned back to P.Steven and asked “How are you feeling right now with me here?” 

P.Steven looked Connie directly in the eyes and answered “It is incredibly hard and painful having you here.”

“Then why did you let me come with you?” Connie asked, beginning to full on sob. “Why did you have this whole conversation with me if my presence was hurting you?”

P.Steven pulled his crying friend into a hug and answered “Do you think I care so little for you that I would make you go away”.

The duo remained like this for several minutes as Connie got everything out of her system. As she was sitting back up Dr. Maheswaran came out of the Back and approached them.

“Mom! How’s he doing?” Connie asked with a mix of fear and excitement.

“Well Connie, Steven?.. what do we call you!”

“To be totally honest I haven’t put any thought into how to differentiate us” P.Steven through in.

“Anyway” Dr. Maheswaran continued “His abdomen has been stitched up and he should be waking up soon if you want to talk to him.”

“Thank you Doctor” said P.Steven wanting to let her get back to work.

Alone again the two talked to figure out their next course of action

“I have to go and see him… alone” Said Connie

“That’s probably the best Idea” P.Steven responded .

“Wait, really? You don’t want to come in at all”

“He trusts you way more than me, and It would probably stress him out more to see both of us together.

“Okay if you think that it’s for the better”

Connie then turned and walked over to the door to enter the visitation area.

As she reached the door P.Steven remembered one more thing

“Hey Connie!”

“What is it?” She responded

“Remember that I’m the more honest part, don’t trust everything he tells you!”

“Got it!” She said before giving him a thumbs up and heading into the back.

P.Steven began to go back to his seat when he heard a ruckus at the front desk

“Come on Just let us in!” He heard a familiar voice shout

“We’re just here to get Steven Universe” another familiar voice continued

“I’m sorry but he can’t be released at this moment miss” said protested the man working the counter.

“Fine this Clod obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing” said a third very familiar voice.

The three voices continued some conversation that P.Steven has stopped listening to as he tried to figure out what to do about the trio who were looking for him and fleshy.

Deciding his best course of action was to get to the room with human and Connie and block it off until she could hopefully get through to him, P.Steven walked across towards the access door to the visiting ward.

However in doing so he walked in front of the ER entrance and was spotted.

“Oh my Stars it’s true” he heard the voice of Peridot from behind him.

“Oh man” P.Steven said as he came face to face with Bismuth, Peridot, and Lapis. Caught like a deer in headlights.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Three is finished! Woohoo! I really hope you guys enjoyed it because I once again enjoyed making it. I’d like to thank you all for the support and love over the last two chapters! See Y’all Next Week!


	4. Confrontation Isn’t my Strong Suit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connie and H.Steven have part one of their overdue talk

H.Steven groaned, there was a blinding light in his eyes, his head throbbing. Sitting up he looked around at his surroundings and noticed he was in a hospital room.

He was confused by this as he didn’t remember how he got there. Closing his eyes he tried to focus on what he could last remember. As he looked back he was able to remember breaking down, the searing pain in his gut, and Pink…

“I’m out!” He said as realization smacked him over the head.

H.Steven lifted his hospital gown and looked down at his belly and instead of the pink diamond gemstone all that was there was a neat line of stitches. 

He began to cackle with delight at this realization, finally, he didn’t have to constantly deal with Pink’s voice over his shoulder, he was finally human, he was finally his own person.

H.Steven’s giddiness slowly began to drift away after he began to think about the logistics of being his own person, he didn’t exactly know what he was. He wasn’t Steven, at least not fully, he didn’t even know what to call himself. 

Before his train of thought could continue the door to the room opened and Dr. Maheswaran walked into the room. “You’re awake?” She asked

“Yes… why is that surprising?”

“Because you’ve only been out of surgery for fifteen minutes”

“Surgery!?” H.Steven proclaimed in shock before piecing everything together “ah so that’s where the stitches came from.”

“Yes, yes it is” Dr. Maheswaran sighed “As a word of warning Connie is outside the door right now and she is hellbent on speaking with you even if you don’t want to. I recommend you two discuss the personal business that went down between her and Steven.”

“But.. I’m not ready to.” H.Steven responded “Not yet!” But the Doctor was already away from the bed causing H.Steven to begin to fret over having to confront one of his greatest mistakes.

Dr. Maheswaran walked over to the door and placed her hand on the handle before looking back at H.Steven. Deciding that the Kid needed a boost in confidence she decided to get his attention “And Universe”

“Yeah Doc?”

“Remember that there is something as a first date.”

“Wait… are you telling me to—“ H.Steven tried to reply

“I’m just a Doctor, I can only give you advice. It's up to you if you act on it” the Doctor replied with a smirk before opening the door and walking out into the hall. 

Once Dr. Maheswaran was gone, H.Steven saw that Connie was entering the room causing him to begin to stress out and hyperventilate.

Connie noticed this almost immediately and rushed over to her friend’s side.

“Woah woah Steven, it’s just me” she said in a quiet tone gingerly placing her hand on his shoulder. After a minute passed Steven seemed, at least on the surface, to calm down. “How are you feeling now?” She asked him

H.Steven was overclocking internally trying to figure out what to say. It’s Connie, Steven’s best friend and one of his only outlets to his human side. But by the same token he remembered the last times he had seen her, so H.Steven decided to go with his go to answer “I’m fine… Everything is fine”

Connie paused for a moment after hearing him before asking “Are you sure? Because you seemed like you were going to have a panic attack when I walked in” disbelief laced in her words.

“Yeah totally!” H.Steven said in an attempt to replicate the tone of voice ‘Steven Classic’ used “You just startled me is all”

Connie sighed hearing the poor imitation of the happy-go-lucky Steven of old. “I’m sorry but I don’t believe you”

H.Steven began to sweat when he realized how easily Connie had seen through his facade. “What do you mean? He asked with a nervous chuckle.

“You’re acting”

“I—I’m what?” H.Steven choked out attempting to hold back the swell of emotion building up inside of him.

“You’re pretending to be someone you aren’t, You sound like you’re beginning to do an impression of ‘Classic Steven’ and you’re already starting to be vague in your answers.”

“Am I?”

“Yes you are.”

“Really, are you sure?”

“Look you just did it again!”

“Did what?” H.Steven continued in an attempt to either distract her or get her to give up. Unfortunately for him this was Connie.

The string of responses and questions continued for a little longer before Connie finally got tired of the roundabout and decided to switch tactics and play to H.Steven’s obvious wish to change the subject.

“Look, Steven I’ll drop the questions”

H.Steven sighed a breath of relief at this only to be stopped when Connie continued.

“IF.. you can answer this question sincerely and truthfully”

“Okay” H.Steven relented “what is the question?”

“The question is are you, Steven Universe the human, okay?” 

H.Steven sucked in a breath and thought about how to answer, If he answered truthfully then the questions probably wouldn’t stop, if he lied they defiantly wouldn’t stop, but if he lied and she bought it then nobody gets hurt and they get to move on.

His decision made H.Steven answered her question with “I feel fine Connie, I really am fine.”

At first it seemed as if H.Steven’s Gambit had payed off as no more questions were asked. But when he looked over to her Connie only sighed.

“What’s wrong?” He asked

“Well your answer proved me wrong but proved your other half right.” She answered

H.Steven was taken aback at this revelation. “My other half as in the Diamond? The pink one? Looks exactly like me but distinctively isn’t me? What is he doing here and, more importantly, what was he right about!?”

“He’s here because he brought you here!” Connie responded becoming shocked at the look of ungratefulness on H.Steven’s face “And he was right that you’re a wolf in sheep’s clothing.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?” H.Steven irritably spat

“It means you refuse to admit out loud that you aren’t okay and it’s changing you, and it’s making you more afraid!”

Hearing that H.Steven froze before he began to uncomfortably chuckle “Afraid. I— I um I” He stammered “I’m not afraid and even if I were why would I be afraid to tell people that I’m not alright.” Attempting not only to lie to her but also to himself.

“Because saying out loud makes it real, and it feels like you’re giving the pain and the fear power over you but that isn’t true. If we talk about this then we can make a change for the better.”

H.Steven finally gave in to the turmoil inside “Connie? How do I start?” 

“I think telling me why you were so afraid to talk with me is a good jumping point.”

“Okay” H.Steven said looking her directly in the eyes “the last few times we were together and I had to make an important decision Stars hit the fan; heartbreak, disaster, broken promises” As he told her this memories of the proposal, the hospital, and Steven’s freak out flashed through his mind.

H.Steven turned away from Connie as his waterworks began. “I’m afraid if I try to talk to you about this I’ll just screw it up and push you away even further.”

Full on sobbing at this point H.Steven was turned back around by Connie who was also beginning to ugly cry with him. “Steven, you never need to worry about that with me. I love you too much to let a few mistakes tear us apart, you’re always going to be my best friend, always!” The two then pulled into an embrace as they both cried.

H.Steven found it funny, he hadn’t wanted Connie to see him cry but now that she had it made him feel so much better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys I’m baaaaaaaaack! I am sorry for the wait for chapter 4, school got crazy and I was left at the end of almost everyday feeling too spent to put a lot of work into this chapter. Thank Stars! That the end of my semester soon approaches so I can once again get these out on a mostly regular basis. Anyways that’s all for now folks!


	5. Listen to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> P.Steven has an escalating encounter with the Crystal Temps

P.Steven was frozen, stuck staring at Lapis, Peridot, and Bismuth. These were some of the last Gems he wanted to see at the moment, in fact if he had a physical heart it would probably have skipped a beat.

“H-Hey Guys, fancy running into you here.” He nervously chuckled

“Oh my stars IT'S TRUE!” Peridot excitedly exclaimed “The Pink Diamond gem can reform on its own!”

Lapis leaned down to Peridot doing a terrible job to whisper “But do you think it’s Steven? I mean he looks like him but..”

“Well I would say that the conscious would probably be Pink Diamond considering it is the Gemstone”

P.Steven grew annoyed at this, they hadn’t been in the room for five minutes and already they were trying to dissect him

“Ahem!” He cleared his ‘throat’ “I am right here.”

“Oh Sorry Pink Dia--”

“Please don’t invoke that name” P.Steven cut in

“But it’s who you are right?” Lapis said in a biting tone “I mean you may look like Steven and sound like Steven but you kidnapped Steven after He ripped you out of his body”

P.Steven’s temper began to rise, He could be accused of being a lot of things but a kidnapper and his mother no less was something that he could barely stand.

“Look Lapis” Peridot piped up noticing the tension growing on both sides of the conversation “Connie came with him, Maybe he used a bubble because Steven was too weak to stand.” Gesturing to P.Steven to clear the air.

But He didn’t, ever so bluntly he responded “You could say I kidnapped Human”

“What!” exclaimed Lapis and Peridot while Bismuth remained silent in shock

“It was for a good reason as he was bleeding but he didn’t exactly come willingly”

“There Dot! They admit it, they did something morally wrong for a ‘Good’ reason” Lapis remarked irritation seething from her voice. “We are going to get Steven even if I have to go through you Pink”  
“You can see him once Connie finishes talking to him” P.Steven responded 

Lapis took up an offensive stance while P.Steven moved into a more defensive position the tension between the two becoming palpable.

Peridot became very uncomfortable at the prospect of the two of them getting into a fight figuring Bismuth could serve as a mediator. 

Before she could Bismuth Yelled “Stop!”

Everyone turned to look at Bismuth who stood tears streaking down her face “Rose..?” she cracked out. P.Steven opened his mouth to respond Bismuth continued “You left me to rot… You played both sides of the Rebellion… and Now you try to Impersonate your own son, our Friend!”

P.Steven could feel his composure begin to crack “That Isn’t true” He said.

Before he could say more Bismuth screamed “SHUT UP ROSE!” and lunged at him.

P.Steven sidestepped her before having to block a flying water cooler thrown at him by Lapis. In the moment it took him to put his shield it allowed to Bismuth rebound and grab him and begin to squeeze in an attempt to poof him.

This allowed P.Steven to get a look around the hospital waiting room, he noticed people all around cowering in fear and running. He needed to get them outside and away from people who can get hurt in the crossfire. “Bismuth I’m sorry”

“Really Rose?” Bismuth scoffed “For what?”

“This “ P.Steven responded before letting out a massive burst of electricity from his body causing Bismuth to let go of him. In the time he was free he made a mad dash for the door and ran out to the beach with the three Gems in Hot pursuit. Eventually, the group came to a stop at the beachfront.

“Please just stop!” he pleaded “I don’t want to hurt you!”

“You see that’s the thing Pink” Lapis said flying over him “We want to hurt you”

Lapis opened her wings and flung several spikes of water at him. Without enough time to dodge or block P.Steven vibrated his body extremely fast letting the water pass through him.

P.Steven then reached his hand out and connected to Lapis’ gem and retracted her wings causing her to drop to the ground.

“WILL ANY OF YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME!” P.Steven Screamed getting dangerously close to snapping.

“No, because you’ll just lie to us” Bismuth responded, swinging an axe down into P.Steven and getting stuck into his shoulder.

Screeching like a banshee P.Steven vibrated his hand and sliced the tool off of Bismuth’s arm causing it to dissipate and his arm to knit itself back together. 

Turning to Bismuth almost completely broken he said in a monotone voice “Time out” causing a set of Pink chains to conjure and restrain the larger gem he lifted his arm up and connected to her gem causing it to glow pinkish “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t retreat you into your gem for you to cool off”

“Because” Bismuth Chuckled “You would be just like before, Rose”

Just like her, he was acting just like her, P.Steven was beginning to cross that line into overkill just like Pink Diamond. P.Steven began to convulse placing his hands on his head and began repeating “Don’t poof”

After a moment Bismuth followed up with “And it was a good distraction”

P.Steven froze as he was unexpectedly his with a giant blast of water knocking him onto the ground. Looking up he saw that Lapis had formed a giant water Titan.

“WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS INSTEAD OF JUST LISTENING TO ME!!!” P.Steven screeched

“Because you’re Pink Diamond” Boomed Lapis through her exosuit

This straw finally caused P.Steven to snap, his pupils went diamond shaped as he looked up and screamed “PINK DIAMOND IS GONE!!!!” At the top of his lungs.

The scream was so powerful you could almost see the sonic waves coming off of it. The. P.Steven jumped up above the Titan in a single bound and summoned several plates, launching them in groups of nine at the Titan. It wasn’t enough to shatter but it would do some real damage.

As P.Steven predicted the Water Titan Staggered and lost some of its form, he then charged his energy and slammed down onto the ground from his place in the sky so hard that it caused a shockwave that crumpled the Titan and knocked over Peridot and Bismuth.

P.Steven floated down landing and catching his ‘breath’. “Now are we done fighting?” he asked.

“Yes, you are.” Came from a newer voice. Before P.Steven could see who the newcomer was he felt a sharp object stab into his back and protrude out through his gut, a spear.

Looking back he saw Garnet, Amethyst, Greg and Pearl standing over him.

Shocked he asked “How did you find me?”

“We got here thanks to Peridot” replied Garnet

Peridot shuffled back and forth nervously “Sorry” she meekly said

P.Steven looked around the beach, to his family and saw nothing but blank stares and dirty looks and began to cry. “You can’t see him can you, you look at me and you can’t see him, please just see me!” He pleaded, but nobody responded giving him the impression that nobody cared.

P.Steven found it funny, he had wanted Them all to see him cry but now that they had, it made him feel so much worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally Chapter 5 is Out! Once again I am sorry for the long wait, but fear not for my semester ends at 3:00 tomorrow and with it I can finally get to set up a more firm release schedule. I hope y’all really enjoyed this chapter and for now see ya!


	6. Breaking Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Aftermath of the fight, the Diamonds show up... you probably get the gist

P.Steven was sobbing, nay screaming. Pinned against the sand by a spear causing a pink blood like substance to spill from his nics and wounds and stain the sand below. 

As the ringing in his ears overtook what he could hear P.Steven looked around at the gems he called his friends and family all standing around and discussing presumably what to do with him. Pearl was speaking to an obviously shook Amethyst, Greg was helping Lapis recover from his crushing blow, A rage filled Bismuth was being calmed down by a stoic Garnet and Peridot was the only one who was looking at him; but not directly, always looking just off as to avoid his gaze.

Suddenly Bismuth’s voice cut through the buzzing “Garnet we can’t keep tip-toeing around the fact that whether they believe it or not” she pointed at P.Steven “They are still Pink Diamond and who knows what they can do? We need to poof them!”

“I understand your concern but I am fairly confident that soon everything will be revealed soon”

P.Steven rolled his eyes at this, explaining everything was all he had done for the last twelve hours. “You do realize I’m right here”

Completely ignoring him Amethyst jumped into the conversation “But he’s like… bleeding, gems don’t do that, are we sure he can even poof?”

“Guys I am right here” P.Steven tried again only to be ignored once more

“Perhaps it is a side effect of being half human” Peridot chimed in “It could be possible that Steven rubbed off on Pink Diamond and overwrote some of the original coding”

P.Steven took a deep breath and decided to try to be noticed a final time “Seriously I’m in horrible pain pull the spear out and I will try and answer any questions you have!”

“We Get It!” Shouted Lapis “You have a spear in you boo hoo, You slammed me into the ground with your insane abilities!”

“That was in self defense!”

“Only because you were fighting Bismuth!”

“A fight which she started!”

“Hey!” Yelled Bismuth silencing both of them “I was justified in that.”

P.Steven let out an irritated sigh “In what world is letting your own projected feelings of betrayal caused by my mom make attacking me justified!”

“I mean…” started Pearl “You are Pink right?”

P.Steven opened his mouth to answer but got caught in a new train of thought. What exactly was he? Obviously he was Steven’s gem half, he was formed out of the Pink Diamond Gemstone.

“Yes… No… kinda, maybe sorta” was all he could stammer out.

The conversation was broke when an object began to descend onto the beach, the diamond ship.

“Steven!” Came the voice of White Diamond followed by Yellow and Blue each saying “Hello” “Is this a good time?”

The ship landed close on the beach, the doors opened and out popped Spinel. 

“Steven! You forgot your foot-thong thingy… Aaah!”

“Why is something like this always happening whenever we show up for a visit?” White asked.

“Who is that down there?” Followed Blue

“That is Pink Diamond” answered Garnet.

Garnets answer was a shock to the Three Diamonds catching them off guard.

“How can this be?” Yellow asked

“Never mind that” Garnet replied “Steven came apart and you three can help us out in figuring out what he knows, is lying about, and plans to do.”

“We will certainly try our best, how long have the two been apart?”

The group looked to Peridot for an answer to Yellow’s question.

“Ah I see you all expect me to have the answer but I wasn’t there when this started… I would need more data to make an accurate decision.”

“Well who does know then?” Asked Lapis

P.Steven sighed as much as he could before responding “Seven and a Half hours”

P.Steven looked up from the sand to see the numerous odd and concerned looks he was getting. “I’ve kept track… Human yanked me out at 8:00 PM and it’s now 3:30 AM so Seven and a Half”

“Oh dear” began White “You two barely lasted five minutes last time you two were separated, Where is your human half?”

“He’s up at the hospital with Connie”

“Okay, Spinel would you be a dear and run up to check on the human part of Steven?”

Spinel hopped off of Yellow’s shoulder, looking up at White and giving a mock salute before racing off to the hospital.

As the rest of the Gems, Diamonds included, went back to their conversations P.Steven looked down at the spear sticking through his chest area. He noticed that there were patches of discoloration across it wherever the pink ‘blood’ had run across it. Upon further inspection he saw that the wound should have reasonably poofed any gem, but he didn’t. 

“Look guys he may be safe now but what if he snaps and goes full era one diamond?” Bismuth asked “We need to be certain ‘he’ cannot snap on us”

“Yes I agree with the Bismuth... to a certain degree” said White “I can simply probe their thoughts to clear this all up.”

“What!” P.Steven Shouted trying desperately to claw away from the area he was trapped in. “You are not digging around in my head!”

“Well man” started Amethyst “You are pinned down, doesn’t look like you do anything about it.”

“Like Stars I can!” P.Steven said “If you won’t remove the spear I will!”

P.Steven then grabbed the spear and pulled it out of the sand and through his body in one swift and painful movement. Biting down to keep from screaming he yanked it fully out of his chest and attempted to make a beeline away from the group.

P.Steven made it to the fringe of the crater before he abruptly was stopped. He was unable to move, when he looked down he saw yellow energy laced around his legs, the power of Yellow Diamond.

“White what do you want me to do with him?”

“Please bring him up to me Yellow”

P.Steven was unable to fight as the energy quickly pulled him up to eye level with White Diamond 

“Now there Pink, are you comfortable? Let’s begin.” Said White her gem and eyes flashing different colors.

Feeling her power begin to wash through him P.Steven took drastic action, closing his eyes and focused all of his willpower into closing off his mind. As he did this White felt it, hard, causing her to leap back in pain, her eyes glowing Pink.

“Wha— What was that?” She asked

“That’s what you get for trying to get in there without permission.” He retorted

Blue stepped forward her clouds at the ready “Maybe you need to feel better before she takes a look” blowing them over into P.Steven’s face. Though he fought against it P.Steven launched into uncomfortable laughter looking pained the entire time.

“There that’s better… White you can try again”

White stepped forward once more, the lights flashed and this time she got into P.Steven’s head and began looking through everything.

P.Steven writhed and contorted in the air as his mind was probed, his laughter becoming more and more hysterical as tears flowed down his face. But something else was happening at this same time, on his right arm a small blotch of discolored spots formed; slowly but steadily growing yet unnoticed by all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well there we are, over a month later chapter 6. Sorry for the long wait on this one but I suffered from a bit of a block half way through and decided to rewrite the whole thing. I really hope it makes sense and that y’all really enjoyed it. Other then that I promise that I’ll see you all again really soon!


	7. Self Crisis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> H.Steven finishes his heart to heart with Connie as the inevitable catastrophe draws nearer.

H.Steven continued to embrace Connie, tears running down his face and onto her back. He didn’t care about anything other than this moment here and now. “This is nice,” he said aloud.

“Yes it is.” She responded, “it almost makes it sad that we have more to discuss.”

“I suppose so, let’s not put this off any further” H.Steven pulled away and scooted over on the bed “where do you want me to start?”

Connie opened her mouth before stopping herself understanding the phrasing is everything. After a minute she asked “What has been eating you up recently?”

H.Steven sighed “that’s going to be a very long story Connie, are you sure you want to listen to it?”

“Yes.. of course I do.”

H.Steven took a deep breath and began to weave his tale, starting back two years ago after he; no; Steven convinced the Diamonds to change their minds. He had encountered something new, something inside of himself. When he made it home he was happy for everything that he and the gems had accomplished but he felt blank… empty.

He went on to talk about how he spent the next two years running from that feeling and everything that brought it up by constantly busying himself by dismantling the empire. One of the things that always got to him was when gems called him Rose or Pink so he tended to spend a long time correcting mistakes like that.

Finally, after the empire had changed for the better he finally got to go home only to have his ‘Happy Ever After’ interrupted by Spinel, who dragged him back into his Mother’s affairs bringing that empty feeling back. Once everything had been rectified Steven finally had his time off, but that made things worse.

“Wait lemme stop you there” Connie interjected.

“What is it?” Asked H.Steven

“You spent the better part of two years running from how you felt?”

“Well— I mean—- yeah.” H.Steven responded

“And you didn’t talk to anyone about it?”

“yeah”

“Come here”

Connie then pulled H.Steven into another hug holding him tightly. When the two broke apart she asked him another question “Why didn’t you tell anyone about this?”

“I’m getting there. After I got to have some time in my ‘Happy Ever After’ I realized I wasn’t so happy and it wasn’t so much after. I tried to run from that feeling by building Little Home School and helping more people but all that did was draw attention to the things I couldn’t fix…”

“Jasper!” Connie finished

“Exactly! So I went out to give it the old try once again but when I saw how strangely at peace Jasper was I… I couldn’t accept that. One thing led to another and we were in a fight, at the end of it I had an epiphany it wasn’t Jasper I hadn’t fixed it was myself” 

H.Steven began to break down in tears as he continued “But I the vulnerable part of Steven hid that away which just started a domino effect. First the Jobs, then the Roses. the Pearls, Bluebird, the Snowday fight, the Graduation, and the Cactus all showing how much floundering I was doing and how little my methods actually worked! Then after that came the nightmares and Peridot the Roller Rink and the Proposal… OH STARS I’M SO SORRY!”

Connie was shocked by how quickly H.Steven’s state had deteriorated as he was describing the events of the last few months. She even found herself tearing up as she watched part of her best friend fall apart so quickly, she recognized that he was spiraling.

“Steven… Steven!” She yelled as she placed her hands on the shoulders of the blubbering teenager “Deep breaths… Take a moment to think of just flexibility, love and trust”

Connie guided H.Steven through mindful meditation a couple more times until he seemed more stable.

“Sorry about that” H.Steven piped up with a chuckle “Man I forgot how worked up I can get about these little things”

“But you shouldn’t have to be sorry!” Connie exclaimed “Sometimes little things seem to matter so much because they do… you never need to apologize about how you feel, especially to me.”

“Right, you’re right as per usual” H.Steven winced with a grimace “well, I might as well finish off.” He said with a darker tone “the Hospital visit… that happened you were there, but afterward, something worse happened.”

“What?” Asked Connie

“Greg… Father of the Century proved how little he knows about parenting and about me he really knows. He spent the following days with me like he did when I was twelve, Ice cream whenever, stories are night, he even took me on a road trip… which is where things got even hairier.”

Connie curious as to what happened between the father and son to break their almost inseparable bond gestured for him to continue

“We drove up to a normal suburban house, he gets out of the car and breaks in like a pro. I go downstairs to write an apology to the owners of the house only to see that we were in his old house. The house of my blood family.”

“Greg finds what he was looking for and decides to rush me out while I’m processing that he had what seemed to be a normal life. He didn’t grow up in the back of a van or have a parent skip out on him, then he plays me a song… Mr. Universe. He then tells me that I should be grateful for my life! That having literally no actual parenting is better than a normal upbringing. I lost my cool, we crash, and he applauds me… I kid you not he applauded me for nearly killing us both, not even a slap on the wrist or a warning… Nothing?”

Connie was surprised by this, Steven had longed for a normal life for as long as she had known him. Learning that it was stolen from him, she couldn’t imagine how he could have felt.

“You know what’s funny, when we were on the road and when I was being lectured back home that emptiness reached an all-time high, I couldn’t stand it, I was choking under the expectations of others… so I ran, I cut loose with Jasper and I felt alive! I finally felt free, I wasn’t expected to be anything other than the best I could be and it was wonderful, but the. We had our rematch, I won… hard. I brought her back but she became like everyone else again, expecting me to be her. I went to Homeworld, nearly shattered White, and you know the rest.”

Connie didn’t know how to respond to H.Steven, her best friend had just dropped all of his baggage because she had asked him to, it was very touching.

“So how does it feel to have all of that off of your chest?”

“Well Connie” H.Steven began, lightly rubbing his abdomen “It feels terrible, like being stabbed in the back if I was doing it to myself and I wasn’t actually in pain”

Connie chuckled at H.Steven’s first genuine attempt at humor “that’s good, it means you’re not holding back”

H.Steven looked up at Connie and a small smile spread across his face “Thanks, for being so understanding… is this what it feels like to have a Steven?”

“I’m sure this pretty much sums up the basic Steven experience”

Surprisingly that got a rather large snort out of H.Steven, who still hasn’t removed his hand from his abdomen, nearly keeling over from his amusement. Suddenly his eyes lit up as he repositioned himself on the bed

“Hey Connie, what’s up with your mom?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well she came in and had a short conversation with me, then completely out of nowhere told me that I should consider a first date”

Connie reddened at this remark

“She did now eh” she embarrassing squeaked out “Why would she suggest a thing like that”

“I legitimately have no idea, it seemed completely shoe-horned in at the end” H.Steven replied

“I mean… it got us to start having this conversation didn’t it?”

“Yeah” H.Steven said with a slight blush also appearing on his face “I guess it did”.

The sappy moment the two teens were having was sharply cut off when H.Steven’s heart monitor began beeping off the chart. Quickly his hands went to his head, fingernails digging into his scalp as he was racked with pain. H.Steven fell back onto the bed jerking and writhing in agony.

Connie quickly pressed the call button on H.Steven’s IV rack. Within moments Dr. Maheswaran and, oddly enough, Spinel burst into the room. 

“Connie, what’s going on?” The doctor urgently asked.

“I— I don’t know we were talking and suddenly he fell back in pain!”

“This isn’t good, Clear off of the bed I need some room!”

Dr. Maheswaran swiftly moved H.Steven back into position on the bed and opened the front of his gown showing an unnerving sight. A perfectly round bruise on his abdomen and a group of blemishes that resembled cracks covering his entire right arm and part of his chest.

“What is that… what's happening?” Spinel asked

H.Steven struggled to look over and stuttered out “... Fighting… Diamonds… Probe… PINK!”

H.Steven jolted up as his shaking stopped, leaving him covered in sweat and pale.

“Steven, What did that mean?”

“The Diamonds arrived and they probed Pink’s mind! The stress was so great it must have spread to me”

“What!” All three of the others shouted

“That’s totally twisted!” Spinel followed “Why would they do something like that?”

“They’re Diamonds” Connie responded “They don’t exactly have any reactions that aren’t extreme”

As Connie and Spinel Conversed Dr. Maheswaran moved to the right side of H.Steven and began to examine the markings on his body.

“Mr. Universe, what exactly are these?”

“These… I-- I think they’re Corruption Scars.” H.Steven answered with a slight waver in his voice.

“What does that mean?”

“It means I’m too late. And that Pink is paying the price for it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd Like to take a moment here at the end to give my thanks to each and every person reading this. Every comment I've read brings a smile to my face and I love to hear what you enjoyed or what you predict is coming next. Aside from that, I wish all of you the best and I hope you stick around to read what comes next. I hope to see you all very soon!


	8. Deep End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Previously: Mistakes were made, Gems were removed, fingers were pointed, people were remorseful but that no longer matters. The Corruption has begun and the beginning of the end is upon us all now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning this chapter was hard to write. I wanted to get this right and as such way overthought this. I hope y'all enjoy it!
> 
> P.S. I do include H.Steven's Perspective and as such refer to P.Steven as Pink once I change to his perspective.

P.Steven jerked around as he was suspended. Forcefully cackling as White Diamond used her powers to look through his mind. As this went on P.Steven felt a slight burning sensation beginning to engulf his right arm and chest but was unable to move his neck and see what it was.

After an excruciatingly long period of time passed White gasped, immediately dropping him onto the ground.

“Oh, Stars…”

“What is it?” asked Yellow

“That… That is Steven, Right there!”

White’s response elicited gasps from everyone around. Each gem seemed to have a slightly different reaction. Garnet once again split, Greg stepped back in shock, Lapis stood solemnly, Peridot was all but sobbing, Bismuth was going through some internal crisis, Amethyst was arguing with Pearl. And the Diamonds… well, they all began to sob and fight over who was the worst.

Suddenly all of the different portrayals of emotion were interrupted by P.Steven… Laughing. He looked around and saw everyone staring at him.

“Oh, I’m sorry… is this not funny?”

“Dude What?” Amethyst began only to be cut off

“Really I find this whole situation hilarious because it proves that I— WAS NEVER LYING! And I’m sorry but I find that bitter irony so amusing.” P.Steven followed by choking back his cackling “This whole situation has brought out the worst in you because when the cards were down it only took White Diamond painfully probing my mind! This really proves my point from earlier… THAT NONE OF YOU CARE!” 

P.Steven punctuated his statement with a new round of inane giggling.

For a second time gasps and sounds of displeasure erupted from around the group.

“That’s just not true!” Yelled Pearl

“Schu-Ball of course we care about you!” Continued Greg

“Yeah we just didn—“ Lapis began

“No— NO!” Shouted P.Steven “This is where you ZIP IT! This is where you finally listen to me and feel bad for everything you’ve done!”

P.Steven looked around and became aware that instead of listening the Diamonds were still sobbing and fighting over who the worst was

“Steven!” White said, “Please don’t take out your anger on everyone else, you were only hurt because Blue and Yellow hurt you because I hurt them!”

“Don’t listen to her, this is my fault!” Blue cut in.

“No, it’s mine Steven all mine!” Yellow cried

P.Steven looked at the display in disbelief not because he was moved but because he had seen it before, three years ago. 

“Diamonds stop!” P.Steven shouted.

This caught the attention of the three who stopped giving their dramatic shows of emotion

“I’m so sick of this! You always use your past and your status as— an EXCUSE for everything you’ve done.”

“Because it’s true!” White wailed in response

Taking White’s cue the two other Diamonds began heavily sobbing once again. P.Steven felt sick to his gut as he watched the former dictators groveling for attention

“Will you all just shut the STARS up!” He screamed as loud as he could “yes you were all involved but this isn’t about you? It’s about me!”

P.Steven turned his back to the trio and began to breathe heavily, the tingle in his arm burning across his body into his leg and partially across his chest making him feel angry. So angry.

He opened his mouth once more “You know I’m tired of you acting like your feelings are so important. The words dripping out of him with raw fury “You make me feel so small! I think you need to be CUT down to size!”

P.Steven then snapped back around, in one unnervingly fluid movement overriding control of Yellow’s abilities before the bigger gem could defend herself.

“Yellow! Reduce yourselves… I want you all to feel what it’s like to be down here”

Yellow struggled against the Pink aura surrounding her, physically attempting to restrain herself. Inevitably she lost her battle and turned her powers on her fellow Diamonds, shrinking them down to the average sizes of most gems before doing the same to herself.

The three of them all looked very bewildered. Yellow, looking violated, screamed, “What have you done!”

“Oh,” P.Steven said with a small chuckle “I brought us closer… just like you always wanted”

P.Steven then turned back to the rest of the group and gave a mock confusion gesture. He then noticed the shocked looks on their faces.

“Steven, buddy… what’s that?” Asked Bismuth

“What’s… what—“ P.Steven trailed away. Looking down and at his body, he saw numerous discolored splotches across his body with a sort of liquid coating them.

“I know I’m not the expert here but that doesn’t look too g—“ Bismuth tried to follow up but found herself unable to. With a terrible force, she was ripped off the ground and hurled over right in front of where P.Steven stood, looking none too happy.

In that same unnerving monotone, P.Steven began to speak “Who are you to suddenly care about me? You assaulted and projected on me, and now suddenly you care at the smallest amount of corruption! That’s rich!”

Bismuth reached at her throat, her hands grasping in an attempt to say something.

P.Steven took notice and, with a roll of his eyes, released the pressure and dropped her onto the ground.

Bismuth turned up to him and simply said “I’m sorry… I am so sorry for losing control, you didn’t deserve that”

“You’re right Bismuth, and I see what you’re trying to do… so apology accepted”

Without a moment's thought, P.Steven vibrated his hand and plunged it into Bismuth’s chest then sliding it to the right, instantly dissipating her form.

“BUT YOU DON'T JUST GET TO SAY SORRY!” He screamed as his insane cackling returned; in turn, the corruption began to make its way up to his neck.

Watching him go off the deep end all of the gems and Greg exchange looks in an attempt to coordinate some sort of plan. Eventually, Lapis stepped forward.

“Steven, I would like to apologize before I do this, you need to calm down.”

Lapis used her abilities to pull water out of the ocean and create shackles around P.Steven’s limbs.

Unfazed P.Steven looked over at Lapis.

“You know you have far too much power for a Lazuli and you know why? Because when you were healed with Diamond essence some got trapped”

Lapis suddenly froze, her eyes full of shock and pain, barely able to stand and as such dropped the water shackles

“However power is given, can be taken away”

P.Steven punctuated by holding up his left hand which held a bubble with trace amounts of the essence, he then popped it and allowed the excess to fall to the ground and stain the sand.

“I wouldn’t do anything for a bit, your body will take some adjusting after being drained of my power.”

P.Steven turned back to the Gems only to see something that made his gut churn, Connie approaching… With Spinel and His human half. It was then that the Corruption flared yet again rising off of his neck and creeping up his face, his thoughts began to run wild Why is she here with HIM? P.Steven just couldn’t understand why the three of them would come down here Unless… his worst fears were realized.

\--------------------------------------------------------POV SWITCH----------------------------------------------------

H.Steven was worried, like, really worried. In the mere moments after he was stabilized the scars had stopped growing but had started getting darker and more solid. Despite the overwhelming fears from Connie, Doctor Maheswaren, and Spinel H.Steven decided he needed to find Pink. So Connie and Spinel helped him up and they began their race down to the beach. Stopping only a few feet away the Trio stared down at the beach in shock.

Needless to say, H.Steven was not expecting what he came across. Part of the beach had been turned into a crater, several portions of which were turned into molten glass, but that didn’t even scratch the surface. His family were scattered and in various states of disarray: Garnet had defused, Pearl, Amethyst, and Greg were in shock, Peridot was crying, Lapis could barely stand, Bismuth was poofed, and the Diamonds had been reduced in size.

He was so engrossed in the image before him he barely even noticed when Spinel tapped him on his shoulder and directed his gaze to Pink, who stood in the center of the crater with his eyes locked on where they were standing. Now to say everyone looked bad was an exaggeration when compared to Pink who was dripping in a thick corruption slime, the maniacal pain reflected in his eyes telling H.Steven all he needed to know. The trio began walking again, quickly descending the crater. Once they got close to Pink he turned his attention to them entirely, an unnerving grin plastered across his face.

“Well, Well, Well, Well, Well, Lemme get a look at who finally joined the party. Ms. Connie, Spinel, and My Human Half! Well, You have them with you. Isn’t that just-- swell?”

H.Steven paused a moment and looked over at Spinel, who seemed just as taken aback that Pink was quoting her of all people. Shaking it off H.Steven decided to respond “Pink? Are you okay?… You aren’t looking so good.”

“Oh well, I could say the same for you Humie. Glad to see you finally came down here to see your HARD work to pay off.” Pink continued, potent malice oozing off of his every word. “I guess you’ve already turned Connie and Spinel against me, Just like you did with everyone else!”

H.Steven felt a little hurt by Pink’s accusation, although he could see where he was coming from. Before he could open his mouth to counter Pink’s allegation Connie spoke up.

“Steven, He didn’t convince me of anything! I’m not against you!”

Pink noticeably sneered, corruption continuing to spread across his face.

“You’re Lying!” Pink yelled as he put a box around the three of them “You are against me, Just like everyone else!”

H.Steven rushed forward and began pounding against the wall in front of him

“Pink let us out off here!” he yelled, “We need to talk!”

“Oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you! You’d like to try and undo what you’ve done so you don’t have to own up to the consequences of your actions! Well… this time you don’t just get to ignore what you’ve done”

Pink then turned around to the gems behind him, and after a brief moment used his abilities to grab Peridot and pull her over in front of him.

“You see Peridot made me think that I could trust her during this, but because of your manipulations, she STABBED me in the back. Now you get to see what happens when you turn my family against me!”

Pink began to cackle madly as he summoned a single panel, shattered it, and began to slowly move the shards towards the terrified Gem. After several painstakingly slow moments the sharp shards nearly stabbed into Peridot before a new voice shouted for him to “STOP!” the voice of Greg Universe.

“Steven… please stop! This-- this isn’t you!”

Pink abruptly dropped Peridot and turned to face his father. Laughing as he spoke “Oh you know me do you? A few hours ago you said you couldn’t believe that I was a part of your son… Parent of the year over here.”

Greg stammered for a moment before regaining his composure “I know I’ve made mistakes, I understand I haven’t been who you needed me to be but I want to become that person. But I can’t do that if you keep turning into a monster!”

Pink suddenly froze, his form slightly glitching “monster” he whispered barely audible to anyone but himself. As he stood a small glowing butterfly fluttered down and perched itself on his shoulder, then another, and another, to the point where they could no longer land on him and began filling the landscape.

H.Steven realized what was happening, he began to bang on the walls harder trying to get Pink to listen to him and drop them, all the while watching as the number of manifested butterflies steadily grew.

“Steven… What are those?” Greg asked Pink.

Pink’s form stabilized as he looked over at the butterfly on his right shoulder. Carefully he touched it causing it to dissipate suddenly, as it did when the corruption finished spreading.

H.Steven kept pounding on the plates which began to crack as Pink unnaturally looked back at Greg. Confined only to watch as Pink began to speak once more. 

“They aren’t important but there is something that is. That phrase you used to describe me… Monster. That isn’t right, not yet.”

“Schtuball, what do you mean by that?”

“The Phrase ‘keep turning into a monster’ implies that you believe that I was close to being a monster.”

“No buddy that isn--”

“No, No you were right. But I never mentioned once what was happening. Which means that you thought I was going to be a monster all along. SAME WITH EVERYONE ELSE!”

“Steven that isn’t true,” Greg said trying to calm him down, not paying attention as the butterflies began to flutter again. Somehow the butterflies were physically affecting the world around them as the wind began to pick up as the swarm began to grow.

“Why else would I have been attacked! Why else would they have probed my mind! I was never going to be a monster until everyone made me one!”

The Butterfly storm behind Pink suddenly hit it’s climax as the wind grew to an unnatural speed. Nearly toppling everyone surrounding him before abruptly stopping. In the place of the tornado stood a single large butterfly, bigger than any H.Steven had encountered in the mindscape. As he kept struggling against a wall it eventually gave through shattering into a thousand pieces as H.Steven rushed through sprinting towards his Diamond half a moment too late.

“I am not my monster, I NEVER WAS!” Pink screamed, beginning to float as his body contorted and cracked in several grotesque and unnatural ways “IT’S ALL OF YOU! YOU ARE MY MONSTER!”

Pink began to glow as his form unraveled leaving only a glowing pink blob. Immediately the giant butterfly flew over and shut its wings over him shutting Pink away from H.Steven. Left with only a few moments H.Steven dropped to his knees, tears hot in his eyes.

“No”

As per usual Pink always has to suffer for someone else's mistakes, but this time it was the mistakes of his other half.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp another month, another chapter. I really hope you liked this one because it was a hard one to write because I wanted to make sure this hit home what I've been foreshadowing. Please feel free to comment as I always crack a smile when I read what you enjoyed. The next chapter will be coming soon...ish, I'm going to try and have less of a wait between this one and the next. Other than that I hope you enjoyed it and I'll see y'all later!


	9. Fallen Apart I - The Mindscape (Redux)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> H.Steven takes the first steps toward redemption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy what have I done... to clarify this is an extended redo of chapter 9. This is the continuity I’ll go off of for chapter 10. I’d like to apologize upfront as I feel like the tone and pace may still feel off but has overall better story content. Happy reading folks!
> 
> (I’m also putting this story into a series titled “You Are My Monster extended Multiverse“ which I really recommend bookmarking. This is where YaMM continuity will be placed both direct and indirect.)

The next few moments slowly crawled by for H.Steven. All around him heated words were exchanged, arguments started, and weapons were drawn and pointed at each other.

H.Steven paid no mind to the situation behind him, he just sat on the sand with his eyes locked on the shimmering blob that used to be P.Steven. It was pulsating, horrible snapping, and scrunches screeching out. 

He mentally kicked himself, how could he have let the situation escalate this far. He and P.Steven had disagreed in the past, why had he let this one grow so exponentially bad? He was jolted out of his thoughts when a voice rang out.

“EVERYONE STOP FIGHTING!” H.Steven turned around to see the chaos had stopped, Spinel was stretching above everyone with her fingers in the shape of a megaphone.

“Now that I have your attention, Connie has something to say.” Spinel said.

“Thanks…” Connie replied before addressing the group “Why are we fighting? Is this really the best way to help Steven?”

The group paused and considered the words before sullenly nodding their heads no.

“That’s what I thought. I know I hurt Steven, and You all know that you have too. We can fight, and feel sorry for ourselves later but right now part of Steven is stuck inside that thing.” She said pointing to the structure P.Steven was encased in. “So how do we get him out?”

The Gems began to deliberate over this. It was tricky because there was no way to tell what was going on inside the bubble. Peridot attempted to use a device to scan the interior but was thrown back the moment it made contact. Eventually White stepped forward.

“What if I use my new power?” She asked.

“With all due respect I think Steven has had enough of your powers,” Pearl replied

“No no! Not those powers, I’m talking about my new powers. I can let him speak through me so we can understand how he feels.”

“I must admit P. That sounds like a good idea” Amethyst said before Pearl could protest.

Pearl and some others attempted to come up with an idea but conceded after a short amount of time.

White slowly approached the bubble, clearly saying “Do you hear me? Just relax and let me in.”

As the lights began to flicker H.Steven instantly knew something was wrong. He felt the negativity pour out of the bubble as it resisted allowing White Diamond into P.Steven’s mind.

H.Steven jumped up and raced towards White, attempting to get her to stop, but yet again he was too late as the bubble shattered, and P.Steven dropped out.

Everyone stopped as he landed, twisting fluidly in an unnatural way, his joints making loud unsettling cracks and pops. There were several things that were off about him aside from the movements, his coloration was lighter, he had the same blank expression plastered on his face and an organic looking creature perched on his shoulder. A Moth to be more specific.

“Steven— Buddy?” Greg broached

“We’re sorry Steven!” Yellow Diamond cried

“Yeah, man!” Followed Amethyst

“Are you okay?” Peridot asked before pointing to the moth “What is that thing?”

P.Steven remained motionless and didn’t say anything out loud. His eyes flickered between the group pausing when he got to White. He quickly gripped his Gem, a small groan creaking out from his sealed lips.

Everybody remained still as P.Steven tried again, letting out another strangled noise. “Tr———xs”

This repeated for a few moments before what he was saying became clear “Trauma” causing everyone’s eyes to go wide. 

As if on queue the moth fluttered off his shoulder and hovered over the group. Robotically it said 

“TRAUMA IDENTIFICATION AND CONTAINMENT PROTOCOLS ENGAGED”

“ERROR… MAXIMUM THREAT THRESHOLD REACHED. DETERMINING BEST COURSE OF ACTION.”

“BEST COURSE PROCESSED, BEGINNING MINDSCAPE CONTAINMENT PROTOCOL.”

With a single beat of its wings, hundreds of glowing copies manifested and descended into the group. 

Weapons were formed, pleads were made, but nothing could stop the swarm of moths. One by one they made contact with Steven’s family, latching onto them. First the Diamonds and Spinel fell, then the Crystal Temps, the Crystal Gems and even Greg and Connie. 

As soon as a moth made contact the eyes of those affected began to glow and they fell unresponsive. 

A single moth fluttered over to H.Steven and landed on him causing his vision to go dark as conscious reality melted away.

H.Steven’s head began to pound, as he opened his eyes the world began to come back into focus but something was wrong. He was no longer on the beach instead he was on homeworld, specifically on the ‘bed’ in the old room of Pink Diamond. Looking around the darkened room he didn’t see any sign of life. 

There were no pebbles or Quartzes or anybody else, it was just empty.

Suddenly a voice rang out and echoed through the room “Don’t hurt me!”.

“Where is that coming from” H.Steven said aloud “They sound… scared.”

He hopped down off of the platform, landing somewhat gracefully on the cold floor below. He listened intently as the voice spoke again “... she can’t hurt me”.

H.Steven walked forward and exited the room all the while pondering what the voice was saying. The words were far too familiar, and the voice wasn’t too different from his own.

Eventually he made it to where the voice seemed to be coming from. It also happened to be White Diamond’s chamber. 

“I’m controlling her, so why am I so afraid!”

H.Steven stopped, a look of pure terror frozen onto his face. In an instant he completely understood where he was, he was in a nightmare.

He turned around and tried to run, not yet willing to face the mistake that transpired in that very room, but found himself smacking into the door he just turned from.

His body was unable to move as the door began to slowly open, beams of multicolored light spilling from inside. H.Steven squeezed his eyes shut as he was forcibly dragged into the chamber of White Diamond.

The Voice began to speak the very words that began this terrible chain of events, he tried to wrench his hands over his ears in a feeble attempt to block out the sound of one of his biggest misdeeds.

“She’s the one who should be afraid.”

H.Steven’s eyes were ripped open, forced to watch as the perspective warped. A giant projection of himself began to puppet the body of White Diamond all the while P.Steven was trapped inside.

“Stop it. I don’t like this!” P.Steven’s Echo screamed”

“Too bad” the projection of H.Steven responded “This is for everything YOU put me through!”

His projection slowly began to move his head back, the one of P.Steven following suit.

H.Steven needed to stop this he wanted to yell it at the top of his lungs but found as his mouth opened no noise could escape.

Both of the projections quickly snapped their heads forward, P.Steven’s slamming into the massive pillar in front of him.

Once the impact occurred the moment froze and the invisible force holding H.Steven released. He dropped to a knee and attempted to catch his breath, tears still hot in his eyes.

“Hello there!” A new, higher pitched, voice came. H.Steven looked up with a start and saw the Moth. 

“What are you?” He asked.

“I am… well in your language I would be called a coping mechanism!” It responded.

H.Steven thought, he felt like he knew this creature, it was right on the tip of his tongue. Then the answer came to him in the form of a ghost of a song, about flexibility and trust.

“We’ve met before, years ago, when I was a part of Stevonnie!”

“Astute as always! I must say it is always a delight to interact with you Steven Universe!”

H.Steven was taken aback by the Moth’s forwardness, he corrected it saying “No I’m not, I am not Steven Universe”

The Moth fluttered and processed for a bit. “You are only half, but that is close enough. You do not have all of your powers or experiences but you have enough to know why you’re here”

“What does that mean?”

“I exist to purge trauma from the current iteration of Pink Diamond be it the original, the Rose Quartz persona, or even her son. Now I have a list of people who have traumatized him and you are right at the top!” It cheerily relayed “he has a lot that is putting him in pain. So while the physical Moth takes care of the physical reminders I, the mental projection, will contain the people!”

H.Steven’s eyes widened “When you say physical do you mean?” Abject horror seeping through his every word.

“Yes! The Temple of Rose Quartz, little Homeworld, the garden, and all other places that trigger a negative emotional response!”

“But what about the innocent life, the good that have come from most of those places!”

“My inquiry is why would that matter? The negative responses always overshadow the positive.”

“It’s complicated to explain! None of us meant to hurt him but we did. The people who you would be hurting haven’t even hurt Pink.”

The Moth floated up to H.Steven’s eye level, a small beam was emitted that scanned his face.

“Interesting” it began “you show no signs of ill intent, rather remorse. I would like to propose an arrangement.”

“What type of arrangement?” H.Steven responded

“I cannot deviate from my current course of action as my systems were damaged when containing the corruption, but if you can awaken all of the potential threats and prove that you all mean no harm, the I will be able to stand down”

“That sounds great!” H.Steven said, his optimism evident “but how am I going to get to them if I’m trapped in here?”

“I will allow you safe passage into the prisons of the others. You will go and convince them to leave of their own devices and I will not stop you. Good Luck.”

With the Moth’s last sentence finished the projection of the palace melted away throwing H.Steven into the mindscape. He looked around and saw four symbols placed within picture frames. The blood rose flag, the yellow star, the era 2 diamond crest, and a globe were all represented. 

H.Steven unsure of what to do approached the diamond crest, extending his hand he attempted to touch it only to find his hand passed right through it. He pulled his hand out and repeated the phenomena a few times before an idea formed.

“If my hand can pass through maybe I can see what is on the other side” he mused out loud.

Without any further hesitation H.Steven scrambled into the painting, he observed a patchwork landscape of what he could only assume were the Diamonds biggest regrets.

Stepping forward he entered the old palace once more and heard a sound of commotion. He followed the sound into a large open space shrouded in darkness, just like his own torture.

H.Steven saw a small crack in the darkness, light spewing forth. Taking advantage of the dream state he was able to leap upwards and land on the surface above. Then everything clicked.

“Disregard that last statement! I might have gotten carried away!” Cried the voice of Zircon, the one who had tried to defend him all those years ago.

A large burst of yellow energy fired through the chamber and stuck the projected Zircon. Reducing it to dust.

“Yellow stop it! Why are you doing this?

“We don’t need to listen to this nonsense! Let’s just shatter Rose Quartz and be done with it!”

“Can’t you restrain yourself?!”

That conversation was all he needed to find them. H.Steven charged into the courtroom and leaped up onto the stand expecting to find the two colloidal gems only to find them in their currently reduced forms.

Blue and Yellow stopped fighting as they caught H.Steven out of the corner of their vision.

“Who are you?” Blue asked.

“What are you doing here?” Yellow demanded.

H.Steven rubbed the bridge of his nose and responded “I’m sorry for having to be so quick with this but we’re kind of on the clock right now”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Yellow said indignantly.

“It means I need you both to wake up.”

H.Steven reached out his hands and touched the shoulders of the two Diamonds. Almost instantly an energy passed from him to them, almost like a static shock that restored their memories.

Tears began to well up the eyes of Blue and Yellow but they were silenced swiftly “I don’t have much time to explain, I need you two to head back to the main area and try to find a way out of here.”

The pair gave H.Steven a small nod before running off into the darkness. Alone again he closed his eyes and began to hone his senses, listening for something to give him a hint of where to go next.

After a moment he began to hear a song. His eyes flicked open to find himself standing in a crater. Pink liquid was flowing through cracks in the ground. Looking up he saw the Diamond ship and the massive forms of Blue and Yellow. Curiously the modern looks of Spinel and White were present.

That was when the singing resumed.

“♫Today… right here… right now! I’ll love again! I’ve already found someone!♫”

“♫Just let us adore you!♫”

Spinel began to walk forward, making a little heart shape with her arms. She then bowed and tried to get on the Projection of Yellow’s outstretched hand.

H.Steven ran forward and yelled “Wait!” lunging forward and placing his hand on Spinel’s Shoulder. 

As Spinel came back to consciousness H.Steven walked over and made contact with White, restoring the elder Diamond as well.

“Steven? What’s going on? Where are we?” Spinel asked from behind.

“We’re in the mindscape, I’ve been here before but this is different.”

“What do you mean different?” White followed up.

“It has weaponized this place against us” He explained.

“Who is It?” Spinel inquired.

H.Steven sighed “I’ll get you guys up to speed on the way back.

He ended up giving White and Spinel the extremely short version of what he had learned so far. The three made their way back to the main void and met up with Yellow and Blue. Approaching the next area H.Steven went inside to find the temps.

_

Landing through on the other side H.Steven brushed himself off and looked around. He was on some version of the beach but things were off.

Everything was covered in a thick, green haze. He peered ahead and saw a brief light in the distance.

“Yep, I should probably start looking in that direction.”

H.Steven trudged forward for a short Period of time and eventually made it to where the light was coming from, a version of the beach house.

“Peridot come on we’ve gotta stop! Are you listening to me? Why won’t you look at me?!” His own voice called.

H.Steven knew he needed to reach Peridot as fast as possible so he began to bound up the stairs, his heart pounding faster and faster as he went.

Reaching the top he flung the door open and raced inside. Turning the corner and booking it to his room H.Steven made it to the door right as the TV switched back on.

“I don’t think I know how to be a friend without something to fix! But I —I can’t do it anymore.” His voice screamed from the screen”

He looked over to his bed to see Peridot frantically trying to wake up a projection Steven. “Steven? Steven! STEVEN!”

H.Steven sadly sighed as he looked at the scene before him. Gingerly he stepped forward and placed his hand on her back.

Peridot looked at him confused, recognition flowing into her eyes. Swiftly she pulled him into a hug, tears flowing freely.

“Y— You’re okay?” She asked.

H.Steven nodded in response before telling her everything he currently knows.

“I’m sorry I can’t tell you more but I need to find Lapis and Bismuth.”

“It doesn’t matter, we’ve been through worse. I think I’ll be able to find my way out of here.”

Just like that Peridot was gone and H.Steven still needed to free the rest of the temps from this prison.

He pondered where to go next, looking around the room for any inspiration.

After a moment his eyes locked on the TV set. Without Peridot H.Steven had expected it to simply shut off but it hadn’t. Instead the screen appeared to be overlooking a sea of inky black liquid.

He became transfixed by the oddity not noticing the area around him changing. By the time he took his gaze off the TV the room had changed into that same substance.

Now even more confused H.Steven turned around and saw Lapis. His face fell when he saw that she was back in chains.

Racing over he quickly placed his hand on her temple, waking her up.

As soon as she was returned to consciousness Lapis began to panic. Frantically she pulled at her chains.

“Woah woah Lapis, you’re okay.” H.Steven attempted to steady her. “This isn’t real, these chains have no bound on you.

Lapis continued to hyperventilate and yank at the chains. “My chains weren’t real before and you saw where that got me!”

She stopped struggling and looked at H.Steven “It’s always the same with me, I turn my back and refuse to listen. Things get really bad and Steven gives me a sappy speech about how great friends we are and that I can do whatever my heart desires.”

H.Steven knelt down and looked at Lapis eye to eye. He reached to the chain and began to rip at it causing it to shatter. “That’s because Steven forgave you… and you can get confirmation once we bring him home.”

Lapis’ frown melted into a smile before she pulled H.Steven into an embrace. Wordlessly they bid each other luck as they departed.

As Lapis crawled through the TV screen H.Steven heard a voice from out in the dark.

“It’s too late. I don’t believe you anymore!”

“Of course…” H.Steven sighed. He knew this was going to be difficult.

Sprinting off the voices continued, recounting the horrible fight Steven had with Bismuth. After what felt like an eternity H.Steven arrived at the source of the sounds. He looked down and saw an outline of a Star on the floor.

Stamping his foot down the Star disengaged from the floor and began to rise. When the platform reached its destination H.Steven was back in the forge, the fight in full swing.

“You should have listened to me Rose! I would’ve taken the war to Homeworld and Shattered the Diamonds!” She screamed, grabbing a nearby statue. “I would've liberated… Everyone!”

Bismuth hurled the statue at the younger projection of Steven. Unprepared the projection was slammed into the wall and fell to the floor barely responsive.

Triumphant she walked over and placed the Breaking Point on her arm, crouching down to place it on the projection’s Gemstone.

“Bismuth, this has to stop” it rasped out.

“What are you gonna do?” Bismuth replied sardonically. “Shatter me”

Bismuth uses the weapon on the projection causing it to crumble into particles of dust. As she turned around she was met by the older H.Steven who placed his hand on her temple before she had time to react.

H.Steven watched as everything came back to Bismuth all at once. Tears began to spill down her face as she looked at the pile of dust that used to be the projection of Steven.

“Bismuth, he wasn’t real… none of this happened.”

“But that’s the thing kid” she said “that’s where we’re headed. Locked in a suicide course because I can’t stop projecting!”

H.Steven quickly jumped into action to try and calm his friend “But you know you have a problem and you’ve gotten so much better!”

“But have I. You saw the aftermath of what I did to your other part; I projected on him and he was attacked then corrupted.”

“Because I lied. Even though I wasn’t trying to I turned everyone against Pink” H.Steven tried to explain.

“Still, it’s funny how easily we believed you.” Bismuth sourly chuckled.

_

It didn’t take long to get back to the main hub. H.Steven surveyed the remaining people he needed to save.

He still had Connie, Greg, Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl left to save.

He took a look at the symbol he could only assume was the marker for the Crystal Gems. With a deep breath he stepped inside and found himself inside the Gem Temple.

Looking around for a moment H.Steven saw a door in the middle of the room. Without staring at it for more than a minute the door screeched open for H.Steven to enter.

The other side was surreal, another blank voice. The only difference was this one had a solid floor and a room below it, the final chamber of the Test.

H.Steven began to wander as he thought about this scenario. This memory could have been for any one of the three but having them all be here seemed far too easy.

After walking for a brief moment the beginning of the Test came into view. He peered ahead and saw someone who appeared to be Amethyst sitting cross-legged above the starting area.

He approached her with the intent to wake her up, only to find his friend clearly awake.

“Oh hey H-Man.”

Thrown off by how nonchalant Amethyst was being H.Steven asked “You’re awake?”

“Yeah buddy” she sighed “I know you’re here to get me out as soon as possible so we can fix everything but the way I see it, we have time dilation on our side.”

“Amethyst I don’t see how that matters right now”

Amethyst frowned at H.Steven before standing up and taking him by the hand. “Come on man, there’s something I need you to see.”

She led him back down towards the end of the test. When they reached a certain point Amethyst paused and pointed off at a projection of Steven.

Listening with the young projection H.Steven could hear the replayed chatter from below them. “But he’s lost his healing powers. We have to give him another ‘success’. He can’t lose his confidence like that again.”

“...we’re bad at this…”

“What!”

“Yeah! You can’t control him and he shouldn’t be taking advice from me and we don’t have Rose to tell us what to do!”

“But he needs us to show him how to be a Gem!”

“Steven is not a Gem. There’s never been anything or anyone like Steven. We don’t know what he needs.”

The projection started to steel up, obviously swallowing his emotions, before turning around to re enter the test chamber as the voices trailed off. 

“Oh” H.Steven said “I haven’t thought about that in years…”

“And that’s my point!” Amethyst responded “Steven overheard us that day and came out worse because of it!”

H.Steven was unable to argue, her words were true. “Maybe you’re right, but you can never be sure until you get to talk to Steven yourself.”

“Yeah… I guess”

“I’ve got to get Garnet and Pearl, can you find your way without me.”

Amethyst gave H.Steven a nod before parting with him.

H.Steven turned around to find the temple door behind him, the insignias of Ruby and Sapphire glowing.

Once the door opened H.Steven found himself back inside the house with a projection of him talking to Garnet.

“I could really use your advice.” The projection said.

“Come back to me later, I gotta split.” Garnet replied. Suddenly the scene froze and Garner looked directly at H.Steven.

“Garnet” H.Steven began “I’ve come to get you out of here. We’re on our way to go help Pink.”

Garnet thought for a moment before responding “Why should I go with you? Wait let me rephrase that… Why do you want me to go with you?”

H.Steven scoffed, he has done this far too many times “Because you’re family and I know you want to make things better with Steven.”

Garnet hummed for a second before splitting leaving Ruby and Sapphire.

Suddenly the terrain shifted and H.Steven was out in the woods with Ruby.

Ruby cleared her throat. “Here I gave him the advice of a hopeless romantic.”

The perspective snapped to the beach with Sapphire. “Here I gave him half baked affirmation you were on the right path”

The area changed to Jasper’s camp. The rain poured down, and a sobbing projection of Steven sat in a crater. This was when Steven murdered Jasper.

“This is where it got Steven,” Garnet said, appearing behind H.Steven. “If Ruby and Sapphire can’t help Steven, what makes you think I can”

H.Steven locked eyes with Garnet, once more fighting the urge to cry himself. “Because you’re more than just a sum of Ruby and Sapphire. Stars, you are literally a being made out of their love, a combination of their best traits.”

H.Steven continued on by stating “You once sung about how you were made of love. If you wake up you will have a chance to prove to me, to Pink, to Steven himself! That your love extends to us.”

Garnet was still for a moment before removing her visor. She wiped some tears away from her eyes and said “If you think so then I can certainly try.”

H.Steven breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay, the only person left in this area for me to find is Pearl. Do you think you can find your way out on your own?”

Garnet chuckled and looked down at H.Steven “Don’t worry, I’m never alone.”

“Yeah… you aren’t.” H.Steven replied, waving to Garnet as she walked off into the woods.

H.Steven turned the other way to find the temple door in front of him once more, it flowed with the insignia of Pearl. He stepped through as it opened and found himself on a gem battlefield… of course.

The wind slowly brushed against him, the serene silence was unnerving. He decided to take a moment and reflect; the ground was littered with shards and dust… how many of his mom’s friends had to die here because of her actions as Rose? How many had to die at the hand of Pink Diamond.

She had created two personas that fought until only one could persist. H.Steven wondered if that was how things between him and P.Steven we’re destined to end, a climactic battle that ends with no clear victor and the lifeless bodies of their family left in the rubble?

H.Steven shrugged the thought off as the voice of a projection broke through the quiet.

“We’re alone now, nice and quiet” Came the voice of his younger self. H.Steven refocused only to find his position had shifted to the upper platform. If he peered over the edge he would be able to see the exchange between Pearl and the projection.

“Good Idea, I’ll meet you at the top!” The projection said as he followed Pearl up to the platform. After a brief moment Pearl arrived on the same platform as H.Steven but didn’t notice him.

“This is really hard to do in sandals” the projection chuckled.

That earned a response of “GO AWAY!” From Pearl.

“Pearl, did I do something wrong?” The projection asked, its voice breaking partway through “You got to tell me!”

The projection steeled in resolve and attempted to jump the gap but just barely missed the edge.

Pearl screamed out for the projection as it fell through the air, just barely grabbing onto a root. 

Seeing it was safe Pearl turned around and was caught off guard to see H.Steven.

“S-Steven?” She asked.

H.Steven sighed. “No… you know who I am, just just need to be reminded.”

He walked over to Pearl and made contact with her forehead. Her memories put back in the proper places Pearl began to tear up.

She lunged forward and pulled H.Steven into the tightest hug he’d ever gotten. 

Pearl’s voice cracked as she sobbed. “My boy! My boy… you’re here.”

“Yeah Pearl, I’m here”

Pearl rugged in tighter, seemingly unwilling to let go of H.Steven. 

H.Steven reciprocated the familial gesture with a warm grin “Don’t worry… I’ll give you all the time you need.”

_

H.Steven only had two people left to retrieve. He already knew that these two would be the biggest issue. Wanting to get it done quickly he ducked through the globe and was spat out in what seemed to be a perfect recreation of Beach City.

It wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out where Greg and Connie were, so the obvious was the best place to start. 

It took all of five minutes of traversal to make it down to the titular beach and three more to find the part of the coast he needed to find, the site of the proposal.

Connie was standing alone on the beach, staring motionless into the crater left behind in the aftermath.

H.Steven attempted to muster up some elegant words to say to get her attention but could find none. So he settled for a simple “hey,”

Connie whirled around, clearly being startled, but calmed down when she saw it was him. 

“Oh… hey”

“Wow” H.Steven chuckled “Steven really knows how to leave a mess”

“What? Don’t say that!” Connie replied clearly a little distressed. “This is my fault.”

“No it isn’t, that was all his… all my doing.”

“But I was the—“

“The one who acted with logic and rationality. Steven was the one who overstepped his boundaries.”

Connie turned in disbelief “how can you say that like it’s a fact?”

“Because it is. I was taking Steven in a suicidal course long before you rejected the proposal.” H.Steven continued “I’m the one who was codependent on you, that’s a fact I have to accept.”

“But, I, b-but” Connie stammered in some attempt to counter his words, but nothing could come out.

“Look, I would love to have a long winded conversation like something out of a RomCom but that isn’t realistic. We’re working against the clock at the moment and I need your help to find Greg.”

Connie stopped and thought for a moment. Eventually she came to a conclusion.

“He will probably be at the Beachhouse.”

“Connie, thank you.” He said “you should be able to get out of here via the lighthouse.”

And with that final word the teens split off. H.Steven used dream logic once more to quickly reach the Beachhouse.

Quickly he walked up the stairs and made his way up to his room. There he found Greg, flipping through a book full of snapshots from his different adventures with the gems.

H.Steven stopped inside of the room, making his presence known. Greg looked up at him with tears in his eyes.

“I can’t believe I missed so much.” Greg said

“What do you mean? You were there for Steven whenever he needed you.”

“But I really haven’t. I was thinking about what that pink you said. I finally figured out why it was getting to me so much. It was because deep down I knew that he was right.”

“Dad…”

“No buddy let your old man finish. I stayed away for my own protection even though I was letting you get in harm's way. Look where that got you, every bone fractured and Acute Stress Disorder.”

“Dad, imagine how much worse it would have been if you had been hurt. Steven wouldn’t be able to live with himself if that happened!” H.Steven countered.

“That isn’t the point. I’ve come across as uncaring to your other half and I need to rectify that. I want you to bring me with you.”

Instead of responding H.Steven pulled his father into an embrace. Both Universe men reaffirming their care for the other.

The two began the short walk to the lighthouse, stepped through the door, and ended up in the void proper with everyone else.

All eyes were on H.Steven as he moved to the head of the group. He didn’t really have a big motivational speech planned; it was crunch time.

H.Steven opened his mouth and began to relay everything about the situation. P.Steven had almost corrupted which awoke the Moth. When it attempted to keep P.Steven for corrupting it took all the damage on itself, creating an unstoppable monster unable to shut down.

“We have all hurt Steven.” He said brimming with confidence. “And we’ve had the chance to redeem ourselves handed on a platter, all we need to do is save Pink!”

H.Steven closed his eyes and looked straight up. “Moth!” He yelled “WAKE US UP!”

Once he finished speaking the mindscape began to convulse. The voice of the Moth could be heard saying “Initializing Containment Release Protocols… Containment Release completed.”

And in an instant everyone woke up. 

“Steven… or whatever you want to be called” the voice of White Diamond came “thank you”

H.Steven responded to her with a small smile before turning away to think what to do next.

As if right on cue Lion appeared in a blaze of light.

“Lion!” H.Steven said running to greet his friend “hey buddy, Pink needs our help, do you think you can get all of us to the temple?”

Lion cocked his head to the side before responding with an affirmative noise.

“Everyone grab on!” He said to the group. Once each and everyone of his family had made contact, Lion roared off and pulled all of them through to the Crystal Gem temple.

With everyone gone so quickly nobody had paid any mind to the state of the beach around them and it came as no surprise that they hadn’t noticed what fate befell the Diamond’s ship.

In the spot the ship once stood sat only a husk of a crater, and multicolored strips of metal, torn to pieces. It served only as a harbinger of what was left to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya guys! I’d like to thank you all for sticking with me while I rewrote this chapter, I really hope you enjoyed it. I’m officially back on track for chapters 10 and 11 so I can hopefully get those out soon.
> 
> (I’m also putting this story into a series titled “You Are My Monster extended Multiverse“ which I really recommend bookmarking. This is where YaMM continuity will be placed both direct and indirect.)


	10. Fallen Apart - The Conclusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Confrontation of the Stevens is finally here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for being late again, I really hope you enjoy this chapter. See y’all in the closing notes.
> 
> *Had a spelling mistake at the end (10/22)*

H.Steven ran through the situation in his head while Lion did his thing. The Moth is corrupted meaning there was no telling how dangerous the situation is. He didn’t have enough time to critically come up with a plan before light appeared in front of Lion and the group was spat out in front of the Beachhouse.

His eyes widened at the scene of carnage before him; car parts, gem weapons, and large colored strips of metal littered the beach as the Moth fluttered overhead. It was noticeably larger, more comparable in size to a gem hand ship.

Before anyone could say or do anything the Moth flapped its enormous wings causing Beach City to be rocked by massive tremors. A chorus of screams and car alarms rang out.

“Where’s your gem half at?” Greg asked urgently.

“I— I think Pink may be up there” H.Steven replied, pointing to the Moth.

“That’s great but how are we supposed to get him down!” Peridot said while practically screaming.

H.Steven felt a wave of uneasiness set in over him. He continued to peer up at the Moth before noticing a figure staring dead back at him. “He already knows that we’re here”

After a brief moment P.Steven broke eye contact and lazily leaned over the edge and fell, hitting the ground with an uncomfortable sounding snap. The gem creepily stood up, as if attempting to use muscle memory without actually seeing it done before.

“Pink?” H.Steven gingerly asked. He took a cautious few steps forward hoping to get a response but was met with deafening silence.

“Pink… do you hear me?” he tried again, still getting nothing in return. Further examining P.Steven it was soon recognized he showed no sign of corruption, his form was completely spotless. H.Steven then realized his counterpart’s face was blank with no indication of emotion. “Of course, you were rejuvenated. You’re back to the state you were in when we first became aware of each other.”

P.Steven cocked his head inquisitively in thought. His mouth opened but no noise outside of a strangled rasp escaped, almost as if he was trying to speak but couldn’t remember.

Both halves of Steven Universe moved closer to each other.

“Don’t worry Pink… we’re gonna figure this out.” H.Steven said reaching his hand out. 

The Moth suddenly chirped into action. “NEGATIVE STIMULI DETECTED… INSTIGATING OFFENSIVE RESPONSE”

The Moth flapped its wings again sending out another massive quake. The windows on the house shattered and large cracks began to extend through the temple.

“Pink!” H.Steven urged “please calm down everything’s gonna be fine.”

P.Steven leveled his gaze on H.Steven and began to glitch. He gruesomely snapped between poses, sickening crackling coming from his every move.

“F—f—fine, Everything is FINE” 

H.Steven realized his error quickly. “Wait Pink that isn’t what I meant—“

The group watched in horror as P.Steven raised his arms causing the sand to swirl and rise. The afflicted sand began to mold and shape into copies of Steven’s Quartz form.

The group of sand monsters all began to road “EVERYTHING IS FINE” as they charged the group.

All of the gems began to summon weapons of various varieties.

Amethyst prepared her whip, Pearl a trident, Garnet’s gauntlets, Lapis a basic water saw, Peridot a swarm of small metal pieces, Bismuth her tools, the Diamonds all with destabilizers, and Spinel clenched her spring loaded fists.

A massive fight broke out with things not looking good for the gems, every time they would destroy one creature three more would just take its place.

“WATCH OUT!” H.Steven heard Pearl yell as one of the larger sand creatures attacked him.

He ducked out of the way as it formed a massive spiked mace and slammed it down where he was just standing.

It growled and swept again with implausible speed, knocking him back into another creature.

The second wrapped itself around him as the first approached. It raised its arm and slammed downwards: H.Steven braced for a hit.

Instead a light sprinkle of sand rained down into him. Opening his eyes he saw that Connie stood in front of him, sword raised.

She made quick work dispatching the two golems and reached out her hand. H.Steven took it and pulled himself up.

“Any ideas?” Connie asked while pointing to the main fight.

It wasn’t going well, the sand creatures were completely overtaking and engulfing the gems. It was obvious that in a few moments they wouldn’t be able to fight back.

Then H.Steven looked over at P.Steven who was still standing silently. He looked back to his hands and saw they were now glowing with pink energy.

“Well I have one stupid one.” He responded

Connie chuckled “Those are somehow always the ones that work.” She gave him an affectionate pat on the shoulder “Now go get him”

H.Steven cast a smirk at Connie “Always do”

Then he was off, sprinting across the beach towards P.Steven.

The energy began to build up on his hands “PINK! I NEED YOU TO WAKE! UP!”

H.Steven ran up and placed his hand against P.Steven’s cheek, the Pink energy coursed through his body and into P.Steven.

In an instant all of the sand creatures were gone as they were reduced to docile particles of the beach.

P.Steven and H.Steven looked at each other. One smiling, the other confused.

“H—Human?” P.Steven asked.

“Yeah. Yeah buddy it’s me” H.Steven replied. A smile spread over his face.

P.Steven’s expression turned from one of confusion to anger.

He quickly grasped H.Steven’s wrist and threw it off.

“Get your hand off of me!” He declared. P.Steven then summoned the shield of Rose Quartz and bashed H.Steven in the nose, knocking the human onto the ground.

For a moment the diamond stood shivering. He cast a glance over to his family standing a short distance away.

He then turned around and superspeeded across the beach, up the temple, and into the Moth’s back.

Before anybody had time to react the Moth let out a thunderous flap of its wings. The cracks in the temple exploded open causing the statue to break apart in large chunks and rain down on the beach.

Everyone gasped as the entire structure fell apart, warp pads shattering, wood from the house splintering into thousands of directions.

No words could describe the pain and horror flickering through their minds. Then the Moth Turned towards Beach City.

They shoved their grief aside, it was time to deal with the bigger picture.

H.Steven was pensive a moment before an idea struck “I need to get up there.”

A collective “WHAT?” Came from the group.

“You absolutely are not” Greg said.

“Yes Steven, what if he kills you?” White added.

H.Steven sighed “I won’t be going alone, I need Connie for this to work”

As soon as He mentioned that he needed Connie to come with him, everyone cooled off.

Taking Connie’s hand H.Steven rushed over to Lion.

“Hey Bud, you got one last portal left in you?”

Lion grunted affirmatively and roared open a portal.

Connie and H.Steven moved to enter the portal but were stopped.

“Wait… what are we supposed to do?” Spinel asked.

H.Steven smiled “Do what the real Steven would do. Sing a song”

He then turned to Connie “Oh and you may wanna lose the sword.”  
_

Connie and H.Steven arrived on top of the Moth before it began its attack. P.Steven stood at the far edge, looking with a cold indifference.

“Why did you two come all this way?”

“We came all this way because we care about you.” Connie responded.

“Care…” P.Steven chuckled “Care is a plastic word.”

He turned to look at them.

“Do you really care about me? Or do you want something from me?”

“We want you to come home!”

“But how far are you willing to go? You can see what I’ve become, what I’m about to do… what is more important to you? Me or the lives down there?”

P.Steven punctuated by gesturing down to Beach City, the pink infernos still raging through the town.

“P— Pink that doesn’t matter right now, what matters is you coming home!” H.Steven whined.

P.Steven’s posture uncomfortably snapped up. It was evident that he was on the verge of tears. “I can’t trust you anymore…”

H.Steven had little to no time to think as P.Steven whirled around, summoning a large hexagonal plate. 

It soared through the air, impeccably aimed at H.Steven. He braced himself for an impact that never came.

Instead the place was sliced in two by Connie who stood between the aspects of Steven with a knife.

“Connie! Is that a knife?” H.Steven asked.

“Yeah” P.Steven said, sounding broken “yeah it is”

Instantly a bubble formed around Connie causing the knife to clip from her grip and clatter to the back of the Moth.

Three plates were summoned and launched into the bubble knocking it off the edge.

P.Steven turned his back to H.Steven “Don’t worry she won’t get hurt. I care too much about her for that.” His voice turned dark and sour “but all the people in beach city, in little homeschool…”

P.Steven gestured to the ground 

“They get to BURN for making me feel this PAIN!”

On that command the Moth reared up and let loose a torrent of pink fire down into the ground below.

It flapped its wings sending a new strong wave of tremors through the earth causing a large crack to form.

Said crack began to glow, after a moment the gigantic arm of the Cluster emerged.

P.Steven grimaced “Aw Cluster… you know it isn’t safe for you to leave the center of the earth.”

He used his powers to summon a large group of plates. The plates slammed into the arm causing it to dissipate. “Best to slumber beneath the crust I’m afraid.”

H.Steven couldn’t stand to watch anymore. Reaching down he picked up Connie’s knife and pointed it at P.Steven.

“Pink!” H.Steven screamed “That’s enough!”

P.Steven turned and met eyes with H.Steven. Fresh tears were streaming down his face.

H.Steven took a step forward, his heart aching for his other half. “Pink I—“

“Shut up.” The words cut through the air like a knife. “You don’t get to take another step.”

The two parts of Steven Universe stayed still. The chilled air whipped around them and the thick plumes of smoke rose stinging the eyes and clogging the lungs.

“Pink please listen! I just wanna talk!”

“NO! No you listen to me! You were my other half, you were supposed the one I could always trust but you threw it all away!” P.Steven yelled, more tears streaming as his voice began to falter. “You tore me away, you antagonized me! You’re my monster… the one monster that I never was supposed to face. And the monster that made me one as well.”

H.Steven stammered a bit. No amount of preparation can prepare for the bite that his words brought.

“What am I supposed to do then Pink? Because we aren’t getting far with screaming at eachother.”

“There’s only one way this ends Human.” P.Steven answered, his voice shattered “Maybe you can go through the repentant villain arc but I can’t.”

P.Steven gestured to the burning buildings and destroyed temple.

“Let’s be realistic here, I’ve turned into the bigger monster, the kind that won’t be redeemed. So do what you have to because I will not stop you.”

“No” H.Steven said now firmly crying as well. “I am not going to hurt you anymore”

“What!”

H.Steven turned and threw the knife over the edge. “I’m done causing harm to you.”

P.Steven leaped over anger building up inside of him. “YOU DON’T GET TO BACK DOWN!” He screamed his fists railing into H.Steven.

“THIS STORY DOESN’T GET A HAPPILY EVER AFTER!”

H.Steven put up no fight, letting P.Steven continually assault him.

“Why. Won’t. You. Shatter. Me!”

H.Steven pushed P.Steven off of him and stood up. A knowing grin spread across his face. “Because I would rather save you.”

Suddenly a sound came from below the Moth, the sound of singing.

“Take a moment to think of just flexibility, love and trust.

Here comes a thought, that might alarm you.

What we all said, and how it harmed you.

The things we did, that failed to be charming, the things that we’ve done.

Well they are swarming.”

P.Steven looked over the edge at the crowd below singing “Wait. What are they doing?”

H.Steven walked over to P.Steven and placed a hand on his shoulder. “They’re singing to you Pink”

“We know, that you’ve lost sight, that you’ve lost touch.

And all those little things really matter so much and they’ve confused you.

But we don’t want to lose you”

The singing transitioned to a chorus of humming, allowing H.Steven to try and get through to P.Steven once more.

“Pink… you aren’t a monster, none of us are. I am so sorry that I hurt you and I promise that if you come back to me I will spend every single day making it up to you.”

P.Steven turned to H.Steven and looked him directly in his eyes.

“I don’t have many of our powers, but I have the one that matters.”

The two parts of Steven grabbed a hold of the other and pulled into a tight embrace. Sobs turning to jovial laughter as they hugged tighter, a bright light was emitted while they fused.

Then there was only Steven, circling around and holding himself tightly. Suddenly aware he wiped the tears away from his eyes and kneeled down.

“Hey buddy they really did a number to you.” He said to the Moth. “Don’t worry it’s over now. Let’s head down there and say hi to our family.”

Following his commands the Moth lowered down to the ground. Once he stepped off he was besieged by his entire family. All at once they began to chatter at him.

“Steven!”

“It’s really you man!”

“Welcome back Steven” 

“We’re so sorry!”

Steven eventually extracted himself from the pile “You all did it, you brought me home.” He smiles warmly at everyone.

“Uh not to be the bearer of bad news” Bismuth Started “but what’s going on with that big… Moth thingy.”

“Oh him?” Steven turned around and placed his hand on its massive head. “Don’t worry about him, he was just confused.”

“Bismuth does bring up a good point though.” Pearl backed up “It isn’t like you can just keep a massive Moth creature as a pet.”

“Right” Steven sighed “Moth initiate shutdown protocol three sub command A. Use confirmation code Quartz.”

“INITIALIZING…” the Moth relayed “Note, corruption levels critical, if termination is proceeded there will be no option for recovery.”

“Please proceed.”

“Goodbye Steven Universe.”

As the protocol ran its course the moth fizzled out leaving no trace. After that it didn't take long for everyone to begin going their separate ways. Bismuth began to work on designs for a third Beachhouse, Lapis and Peridot left for Little Homeworld, Garnet went with Amethyst and Pearl to give an official statement to the press, and the Diamonds were now small enough to take a warp pad back to Homeworld.

Greg went off to assist the People of Beach City. Before leaving he made sure to check in with Steven to reaffirm that he means to take a more active role in his life.

That left Steven alone. He took a deep breath before walking down to the pier. Instead of going into any of the buildings Steven simply walked to the edge and sat down on a bench, breathing in the salty air for a moment.

He was home… for a moment he could just be himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was it, the “ending” of the main plot. Don’t worry YAMM isn’t ending yet, we still have one chapter to go and this incarnation of Steven is far from the end of his story. I’d like to thank you all for sticking it out this far, and remind you to bookmark this story and the series for when I get around to my other plans. I’m also working on an Owl House Story at: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27143410. Give that a look if you want (it may or may not have a direct connection to this story you’ll find out eventually).
> 
> TLDR: Thank Y’all for sticking it out this far, I hope you’ll stay tuned for the final chapter and what comes next.


	11. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Epilogue for the main story of You are my Monster and a look at where the future is headed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, the wait is finally over. I really hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and are willing to stick around for where we follow this incarnation of Steven

Darkness. Steven was surrounded by darkness. For everything he was unable to see he could hear double. The rain violently beating down, thunder crackling through the night.

He felt like he had just been sprinting, heavy breathing, joints and muscles aching. After a few attempts his eyes were able to blink away the darkness. He was in his bedroom.

Correction, he was not in his current room, he was in his room from the second Beachhouse. The one he had—. Steven shot up out of the bed and raced down the stairs towards the bathroom.

Slamming the door behind him Steven turned the sink on at full blast and began to splash himself in the face with the water. 

His face fully soaked he pulled himself up to the mirror and noticed he didn’t have his contacts in. His eyes clearly shone pink with Diamond pupils.

The thunder outside picked up as his breathing quickened, transitioning from a comforting boom to increasingly ominous screeches.

Suddenly the wall of the room was torn off. Looking through Steven saw a massive pink beast shrouded in mist. He turned back to the mirror only to see his face had changed.

Instead of his familiar face the terrifying mug of the monster stared back at him. It began to whisper a phrase that made his blood run cold.

“You got off easy… you can try to run, but you will never escape me.”

Steven turned back to the hole just in time to see the monster slam its gigantic horns into the house.

_

Steven shot upright in bed. Wiping the ice cold sweat off his brow he quickly looked over at his clock. It read 9:35 AM… figures.

He once again rubbed his face, hardly sighing when he saw a continued pink glow coming off of his eyes.

“I’m definitely gonna have to get those looked at, of all the adverse effects I could have, I now have permanent diamond eyes” he whispered to himself.

Steven begrudgingly rolled out of bed ready to face the day. He quickly got onto his feet and walked downstairs into the kitchen to get breakfast.

Pulling the box of multigrain cereal out of the cupboard to make himself a bowl Steven decided to switch on the television for some background noise.

He took a large bite of his breakfast before cringing and spitting the spoonful out. It was stale. He made a mental note to grab food while he’ll be out before emptying his bowl.

Steven heard a yawn from behind him, turning to see Amethyst stirring from the couch behind him.

“Seriously man, you have to sleep in every once and a while right?” She said.

“Amethyst it’s nearly 10 o’clock” he responded with a laugh.

“I know! Way too early for a Sunday… Eh what the heck, can you put on the coffee for me?”

“It will be my pleasure.”

The machine chirped to life when the button was pressed, dispensing the dark and bitter substance.

The two of them sat down at the counter, Turning their attention to the TV as the familiar jingle for the news chimed.

“Hello and welcome back to Delmarva News 6 at 10:00 AM, bringing you urgent news country wide authorities are still searching for teen, Luz Noceda, reported missing nine months ago. If anyone has anyone has information regarding her whereabouts they are pressured to come forward”

“Wow… her poor family.” Amethyst said in reaction. “It’s sad that we have a frame of reference for that.”

Steven cringed hard before responding “why is the news always so depressing nowadays?”

“I don’t know man…” she then turned back to the screen and said “hey turn that up this looks interesting.”

Steven obliged as the second story began.

“In other news citizens of Beach City are finishing the preparation of a festival to celebrate the anniversary of Steven Universe becoming the first ambassador of planet earth.”

“Well I guess I stand corrected” Steven said. “Maybe I should give them a visit while I’m out today.”

Amethyst turned to Steven with a puzzled look on her face. “Are you really trying to get out in town again? You remember what Pearl did last time right?”

“Yes I know…” Steven groaned “But I can’t stay cooped up in here forever, it isn’t healthy.”

Amethyst let out an amused snort “Okay man, what music do you want played at your funeral?”

Steven genuinely laughed at her joke before responding “I’ll get back to you on that one.”

Steven quickly finished cleaning up before heading back upstairs to get ready for his busy day. 

Throwing open his closet he pulled out his classic ‘Sadie Killer and Suspects’ tee shirt, tan cargo pants, and his new jacket.

He quickly got together and zipped his jacket before examining it in the mirror. The jacket was a loose fit zip up hoodie with a diagonal star on the chest. Inside the star a middle part in the shape of a diamond was shaded hot pink.

Satisfied with his overall look Steven completed his ensemble by putting in a pair of colored contacts to his eyes to their original human color.

Steven grabbed his phone off the charger pad and went downstairs. He made it all the way to the door before he was cut off by Pearl screaming “Steven! What are you doing!”.

Jumping back in surprise Steven responded “Cool down Pearl… I’m just going out into town to run some errands.”

“You are certainly not.” Pearl commanded “it isn’t safe out there yet, you haven’t even finished your recovery!”

Steven sighed “Pearl part of my recovery process is reintegrating once I feel comfortable. Besides, I have an appointment at Rebecca’s office at 12:45.”

Pearl tried to counter Steven with any valid excuse she could think of but could find none.

“Just be safe Steven. I don’t want you to get hurt anymore.”

Steven smiled before giving Pearl a hug. “Don’t worry Pearl… I’ll be fine.”

Steven then walked outside and went to the Dondai. Starting her up he began humming as he returned to Beach City for the first time in a month.  
_

“I think leaving is your best option given the data of your reactions” 

Steven sat in disbelief. Sitting upright on the couch he looked over to his therapist, Rebecca. 

“But why would I— How could I even do that? It’s hard enough convincing the Gems to let me leave the house!”

“That is exactly why you need to leave… if you let your family smother and control you nothing will ever change. Beach City and Homeworld are the two main places where your trauma stems.”

Steven could see the logic of the Doctor. He placed his head in his hands and sighed “can I at least wait and think this over some more”

The therapist chuckled softly and scribbled some more notes in her notebook. “I wouldn’t expect anything less; you should discuss this with your friend Connie, she has a good head on her shoulders. But remember that this choice needs to be yours, don’t decide to stay because you’ll feel like abandoning the people you love”

“But” Steven began “it hurts to think about leaving them”

“Sometimes making the right decision hurts, and in this case you need to put your own needs above theirs”  
_

“Steven… Steven what’s going on?” Connie asked, snapping a finger in his face which roused him from his thoughts.

“Huh?” He mumbled back.

“You aren’t as talkative as you usually are. Something on your mind?”

Steven paused for just a moment before responding “I have to go”

Connie was taken aback “you mean in the middle of our date?”

“No no no” Steven corrected “just in general, I need to leave Beach City and not look back for a bit.”

“I don’t know…” Connie began “given your mental state you might not be able to strike out on your own.”

“Come with me then. I’ve done my research and we can travel across the country and have you at college a week in advance.”

Connie was phased for a minute, obviously absorbed in thought “Steven I don’t know how to say this… I’m leaving in an hour. I—I wanted to get a head start; I have a flight out of Empire City tomorrow”

Steven thought, he so desperately wanted this to work, he wanted to leave this place, he wanted to leave with her. Then he had a new idea.

“Then we leave in an hour, I’ll go pack my stuff, leave a message for everyone, and after that we can go to Empire City for your flight.”

Connie chuckled briefly before realizing Steven was serious “No— no Steven, what about saying goodbye? What about the festival tonight? You should go speak at it.”

“NO!” Steven responded, realizing quickly that he’d raised his voice. “Sorry… but I can’t spend another night here. And if I say goodbye in person then I don’t think I’ll be able to go”

“Okay then” Connie said, placing a hand on Steven’s “you go take care of what you need to do, then I can get to my flight and you can have your needed vacation”  
_

Steven steadied the camcorder and pressed play.

“Hey guys, I know what you’re thinking. ‘Why is he leaving us a video tape rather than talking to us’ well it’s because I don’t feel like I can.”

Steven bit his lip before continuing “I don’t think I can go through with this if I see you all. Don’t feel too bad about this… I’m not alone, Connie’s going to be with me for a little bit of the journey. My phone is gonna be on silent for the first 48 hours and I promise I’ll make contact once I’m far enough away where you can’t violently hunt me down and drag me home.”

The young man cringed after mentioning the violent dragging. “You know what? Forget I mentioned that last bit.”

“I’ve left each of you a gift: Pearl my Ukulele, Garnet my Wedding planner guide, Amethyst my video games, Bismuth my Mom’s original banner, Lapis a set of watercolors, Peridot a genuine star shirt, and Dad my room.”

“I love you all, I promise we’ll see each other soon.”

Steven flicked the recorder off and removed the tape from it. He walked back into the third Beach House and set up a little area with the gifts and a TV. 

Finally he produced a marker and inscribed the words ‘Gone for Vacation’ onto the tape and laid it down on the top of the TV.

As he walked towards the exit door Steven cast a look back into the house. It wasn’t the one he grew up in, but it was close enough.

Bittersweetly, Steven considered not leaving. He could stay, he didn’t need to leave. 

Then the TV flicked on “You have no idea how bad I am, STEVEN’S HERE TO HELP!, started a domino effect, NONE OF YOU CARE!, Why! Won’t! You! Shatter! Me!”

Steven raced back to the TV as his knees buckled.

His heart began racing a mile a minute as horrible images appeared on the screen, culminating in that Pink, Godzilla like creature appearing on screen.

He’d had enough, Steven screamed at the screen “WHAT ARE YOU?”

The creature spoke back in a cool monotone “I’m a monster, I’m what you were and still are, I am what you are destined to become.”

Steven pulled himself off the ground and sprinted towards the exit door ignoring the copious amounts of butterflies appearing around him.

As he cleared the door and slammed it shut Steven heard one last phrase that solidified his need to leave Beach City.

“You got off easy.. you can try and run but you will never escape me”

Words that became all the more chilling in his own voice.

Not willing to spend another moment by the house Steven hopped inside the car, where Connie was already waiting for him.

He started the car as soon as Connie was buckled in. A worried look spread across his face as he pulled away from the Beach House, nobody there to him goodbye.

His heart began to ache even more when he saw the massive Now Leaving sign.

Once it was out of range, he took a deep breath and a sigh of relief.

“Hey Connie?” He asked “Can you get the music out of your glovebox?”

Connie obliged and handed him a disc with the title ‘Love Like You’ written on it.

Popping the disc in Steven pressed play and turned up the volume. A voice came from the speakers along with the accompaniment of an acoustic guitar. 

“If I could begin to be,  
Half of what you think of me  
I could do about anything  
I could even learn how to love!  
When I see the way you act  
Wondering when I’m coming back   
I could do about anything  
I could even learn how to love!” The voice sang, the voice of his mother.

Steven felt a small tap on his shoulder, when he looked over at Connie she said “You know, your mom sings really well.”

“Yeah” Steven said, his voice welling up with emotion “Like an angel…”

Caught up in the conversation nobody in the car noticed when the tire pressure gauge jumped to the red.

By the time Steven looked back it was too late. The music continued to play as a tire popped and the car flipped.

“Look at you go!  
I just adore you   
I wish that I knew  
What makes you think I'm so special!  
If I could begin to do   
Something that does right by you  
I would do about anything  
I would even learn how to love  
When I see the way you look  
Shaken by how long it took  
I could do about anything  
I could even learn how to love like you   
Love like you...   
Love me like you”

The Dondai skidded to a halt completely upside down. Connie was knocked unconscious with Steven barely holding onto his awareness.

In a last ditch effort to remain awake he pulled all of his energy into himself and tried to use his gem.

Suddenly all color drained from reality, leaving only Steven.

“Hello? Helloooo… anyone out there?” An unfamiliar voice came. It was shrill and high pitched yet had a cynical darker edge to it.

“Yes I’m here!” Steven yelled back “I’m in the car!”

“Wait… you’re actually real?” The voice asked “like properly another person. I’ve been alone since 2012 so it gets hard to tell what’s real or my own psychosis.”

“Well I am fairly certain that I’m real” Steven impatiently replied “can you please get me out of here!”

“Don’t sweat it I’ll get you outta there” the voice responded. 

In a flash Steven found himself standing outside of the crashed car. In front of him floated his savior, a small yellow triangle wearing a top hat and bow tie.

“Woah, you're a Steven aren’t you?”

“Y—yes my name’s Steven Universe.” He answered “why are you asking Mr…”

“Cipher, Bill Cipher” the triangle guy said back “I’m asking because that means I’m no longer in the dimension I was trapped in. All of you universe variations exist in the YM branch of the multiverse while I died in the GF branch.”

Steven wasn’t following this. “I’m gonna pretend that some of those words are attached to actual meanings, what does this mean?”

“This shouldn’t be possible, Belos made sure to trap me in dimension GF-46” Bill answered “The only way I can be here is through the mindscape. Did you by any chance access it just now?”

“Not intentionally.”

Suddenly a miraculous event transpired. Seemingly out of nowhere a large, pulsating, crack tore into existence.

“Okay I’m getting really sick of ominous events interrupting my vacation.” Steven groaned “Bill do you know what this is?”

“That’s a crack, a split in the fabric of reality itself.” Bill said sounding slightly fearful “this is two parts of time a space that never should have touched being pressed together; Anything can happen!”

Steven rolled his eyes and approached the crack. He said “it can’t be that bad” as he stuck his hand inside of it.

Immediately Steven was blown backwards, slamming into the paved ground below. The crack began to expand. It tripled in size allowing several unfamiliar beings to travel through.

The leading one, who looked quite regal, pulled out a notebook and began to make a marking in it.

“So… The intel Lus provided was correct after all; the Starchild is here… Inter-realm portal test one is a success”

Steven readied his shield as he stared down the obvious bad guy. “Who are you and what do you want?”

Before the figures could respond Bill interjected “You? Really!”

The leader began to laugh, his voice sounding unnaturally chilled “Oh William! I didn’t expect to find you here alongside the Starchild. The Titan’s plans are going to be achieved far sooner then expected.”

Steven rolled his eyes and said “Can someone please tell me what’s going on?”

The lead figure swiftly approached Steven and gave him a once over. He then turned back to his group and began to command them.

“Bill and the Starchild are psychically linked. Take the physical and the mental is forced to follow.”

All of the other beings went back through the gateway and returned moments later activating a massive device.

When the machine activated a large beam of energy shot out and grabbed Steven by the ankles. He found himself unable to fight back as the strange device whisked him away.

And just like that neither Cipher nor hybrid was left where they were. As both unwilling participants were dragged through to another world the crack snapped shut behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that was You are my Monster. I’m really happy with how this story turned out and I hope you all enjoyed this wild ride. I’d like to thank everyone for sticking through this story with me and I hope you’ll follow this Steven’s story further.
> 
> Next time we see him won’t be too far off (but depending on my motivation might take a few weeks) so be ready because he’ll be “joining” the cast of characters in my other story The Future is What You Make of It.
> 
> Thank everyone again and I’ll see y’all later!

**Author's Note:**

> Well, that was part one... What did you think? I hope you enjoyed this because I had a lot of fun writing it and pouring all the sadness of the show ending into it. I'll try to do new chapters weekly and be more consistent than my other multipart works. I'd also like to do some talking from the heart: I love this series and the group of fans that come with it, even though the show is over I hope we can keep the fire alive for a long time.


End file.
